Saturday, September 08, 2007

What Do You Think of Charles Stanley?

This evening, I think of Charles Stanley. He was faithful. Yet, in 2000, his wife of 44 years just walked away and filed for divorce. He still prays for her to come back.

Large numbers left the church because of this. Radio stations in various areas cancelled his "In Touch" radio program. Various Christian leaders commented that he should be prohibited from further service. But his growing church, First Baptist Atlanta, still accepted him as pastor. And he remained at In Touch radio ministry to the present.

I find that some things are really hard to explain. Many of us may struggle with trying to understand what the Bible says in pastor Stanley's case. But it appears that he had been forced to live out a decision outside of God's design made by his loved one. That decision has placed him where he does not want to be. I can imagine how broken pastor Stanley has been.

Is it possible to have a sorrowful marriage while having a personal character that is above reproach? Well, I think of the prophet Hosea in the Bible. And yes, what about God? You will recall that He had a divorce from the nation Israel (Jer. 3:8)!

Continuing in ministry after the divorce was met with a lot of resistance in pastor Stanley's case. I think of Moses who was a murderer. David was an adulterer and murderer. The apostle Paul probably killed people. Were they still accepted by God to serve Him? Of course, there is always a time for repentance and healing. Yet after that, God sees no longer what a man was but what he now is.

I think of how pastor Stanley felt when even Christians started to judge and reject him. What do you do when the very place where you should receive help or grace is the very place where you get rejected even further? Someone said that the church is the only army that shoots its own soldiers! I think pastor Stanley should not get mad at God's children. They should know better, but they are also human.

I think God's promise to pastor Stanley and the rest of us in Hebrews 13:5 is in effect: "I will never leave you nor forsake you." God plus you is a majority!

94 comments:

Andrew said...

Angelo,

Dr. Stanley is a very good and gifted communicator. There is no reason that he could not continue to teach, minister and share the love and grace of God.

When he promised, from the pulpit to the congregation, to step down if his wife ever divorced him, I believed him. However when she did divorce him he said that the reason he wouldn't step down as promised is that no one can know the future and comments (promises) like he made have to been seen in that light.

Huh?

He had refused to hire or retain divorced staff - until he became one.

His associate pastor at the time, Geral Spicer, told the the congregation to stand and affirm Dr. Stanley in both morning worship services.

Gearl manipulated the congregation and misused the trust and authority he had been given.

Dr. Stanley had proclaimed a biblical standard and had upheld that standard until it applied to him.

He was and is a beloved and respected pastor. His broadcast ministry could have easily continued without him being pastor of FBA but for whatever reason he chose to dig his heals in, change his Biblical views and hold on to both the church and broadcast ministry.

I believe he should have stepped down - the majority of the congregation would have not wanted him to - and continued to pursue In Touch as his primary ministry which had been since the middle 70s.

His refusal to step down set a low standard for pastors. As a respected pastor, his actions and words helped pave the way for others to live by a lower standard and to treat the Word as flexible.

Adrian Rogers, a friend and contemporay of Charles Stanley once said, "We will never violate the principles of Scripture to recover and preserve the integrity of Scripture."

I think this mindset would have served Dr. Stanley in his very unfortunate divorce with Anna. My heart goes out to them both, their children and grandchildren.

God's grace and mercy and forgiveness is adequate for them and us all. But we must each bear the consequences for our sin, disobedience and weakness. Grace and forgiveness do not erase consequences.

Andrew

Enrico said...

As a man who knows he was called of god to preach the Gospel of Christ, and who God has not removed that desire from, I know what divorced people go thru. My wife left me because she didnt want to serve God and my "church" totally rejected me. After staying out of church for a while i met and married the one God had for me and we have been married over ten years and fortunately I had a pastor who welcomed me and the talent gave me into his church and restored me to be a youth pastor. to him i will always be grateful, however I have had no luck in finding additional opportunities to preach, since lleaving that church on good terms due to a move to a different state I have only been successful in finding a church that only allows me to work in a minor roll and with a church that states that divorced people are not different and should be loved but actions speak louder than words. No divorced men are allowed to be deacons or hold title of pastor due to their interpetation of Timothy. I however do believe those verses speak to a mentality not a number. Divorced men have not committed the unpardonable sin!!!!! Either God forgives or he doesn't, you can't have it both ways. I chhose to believe he does.


I also don't believe that divorce disqualifies someone from being a pastor. The text in I Timothy and Titus about being the husband of one wife refers to the practice of typical Greek men of having multiple sex partners. I don't think Paul was thinking of divorce at all when he wrote that. But this verse has been traditionally applied to divorce and it's become ingrained in our church culture and way of thinking.

I believe being a pastor is more of a spiritual gift than a calling (Eph. 4).

Preston Cave said...

I see Andrews point that Dr. Stanley did not play by the same rules as he expected everyone else to play by. I do not know the reasons for the divorce, but know that there are Biblical rules to follow when getting a divorce. There could have been a Biblical reason for his divorce. (I am speaking as one who has just now heard the news of Dr. Stanleys divorce.) None the less, it happened.

So, should someone step down from being a pastor if it was not their fault? I should ask it this way: Can God still use someone who was forced to get a divorce? The answer to the latter is "yes". I watched my father go from an angry man to a wonderful man and Pastor after his divorce with my mother. God could not use him until he was willing to be used. He finally followed God's call in ministry when he got an unwanted divorce.

Now Dr. Stanley's situation is different. He was already serving God faithfully before the divorce. So why did the divorce happen?

Andrew above speculates that it was the sin of Dr. Stanley when he says, "But we each bear the consequences of our sin, disobedience, and weakness."

Though I understand it, the problem with this way of thinking is that we do not know if Dr. Stanley had sin that caused this. I am reminded of the man who was born blind as recorded in John 9. The disciples asked Jesus who sinned, this man or his parents? Jesus said that he was not blind because of his or his parents sin! WOW!

Because of this, I am very careful when trying to understand why certain things happen not to judge without knowing everything. Since we do not know everything, I think it is unwise to blame the divorce on Dr. Stanley's sin. What if he was in the right? What if there was no sin to be found in his walk with the Lord? What if he was like Job was when his life crashed? We do not know the events that caused the divorce, so we must be very careful to blame sin. It was not Job's sin that caused his hardships.

Now, I am not trying to be biased here, but want to be as Biblical as I can. There are Biblical reasons for a divorce. There is no verse that says God can not use someone who has been divorced. The main verse the church uses today is the verse that speaks about "being the husband of one wife." Has Enrico vialated this verse? No. He is the husband of one wife. Has Charles Stanley violated this verse? Not any more than one who has never married. The question is, should he be blamed for the divorce or should his wife? Who was at fault? I understand that even when one person leaves, alot of the time it is because of the other persons actions. Yet we do not know if this is true in Dr. Stanley's case, so we will be careful to not judge too quickly.

To go back to Andrews main point: Charles should have stepped down as pastor because he has required the rest of his church to live by a certain standard. I wonder if God is not teaching CHARLES a thing or two about how legalistic he might have been in the past concerning the issue of divorce? I bet Dr. Stanley will not be as quick to say "no" in the choice of bringing a divorced staff member on board. I believe he is not lowering his standard, but rather raising it to the standard we find in the life of Jesus. I think Charles realized that sometimes things happen that we have no control over. He will be more cautious in blaming a persons sin for that persons hardships.

I hope this comment is understood correctly. I am not advocating divorce. I am simply confronting the notion that a persons ministry is over after a divorce. I do believe there will be serious consequences on ones ministry if they were the cause of the divorce, yet want to caution you not to judge too quickly. A lot of times, when we are DOWN to nothing, God is UP to something.

I hope this helps,

Preston

Anonymous said...

In the mid ninties my husband and I were at a dinner of Christian Doctors in Texas.Across from me the daughter of one of Dr. Stanleys secretaries made it known after much talk of the situation,that Anna just didnt wish to be a part of any sort of ministry.He was very broken but still felt called to continue praying for her to return.

Anonymous said...

Judge not unless you have walked a mile. This divorce is an example of life and committment is not an easy walk. It allows those with doubt to cast that first stone like Andrew. It allows others such as Preston to look the other way or perhaps it is one of God's test for Dr. Stanley to see how he recovers from such adversity or better yet a beacon to the rest of us still married to make a more determined effort to find accord with their own spouse

sheila said...

Can a wounded soldier live? Yes they can, they often do in the Army of the World. But how come in the Army of the Lord we often seek to kill our own wounded soldiers. Charles Stanley is an outstanding man of God, I find him to be very faithful and one who seeks to live with his life being an example of the love of God.

Things happen in our lives, but who gave other christians to judge another. God is the judge of all and if He can have mercy on us then we should have mercy on each other. Today the church is acting just like the world no wonder the unsaved would rather suffer than come into the church and suffer more because we kill our own.

Today, I can say my life has been influenced by Charles Stanley's teachings, I endeavour to pray for him and to support his ministry. Before we judge him or his wife, endeavour to pray for them. Endeavour to love them with the love of the Lord and seek God on how He can use you to help these wounded soldiers live.

Anonymous said...

Dr. Angelo,
Your statement "He was faithful." may or may not be true. No one but God, Charles Stanley and his wife know what went on in their marriage behind closed doors. It is entirely possible that he was unfaithful to her in many ways that broke his marital vows long before she filed for divorce.
For insight into what that may have looked like, I refer you to the article "The Silent Killer of Christian Marriages" by Amy Wildman White and the book "Keeping the Faith" by Marie M. Fortune.

Anonymous said...

I am not able to know the heart of either spouse. I went through a divorce myself and have remained single for 12 years and running. My spouse decided she wanted something other than what I had to offer. Fingers can be pointed by anyone in a vain attempt to identify the fault of the failed marriage. Jesus said Moses allowed divorce because on the "hardness of men's heart". When a man builds a house and someone else burns it down, who do we "blame" for the destruction of the house? I suggest we all look to the Lord and seek His will in our life instead of attempting to destroy a man who is doing what God called him to do. Are you known by your work for God?

Harley

The Reverend Doctor said...

Dr Stanley did nothing wrong. His wife became possessed by Lucifer and left him. He had no control over this. I have also had such an experience. Those that criticize him for this are doing the Devil's work in being an "accuser of the brethren".

Anonymous said...

It would be nice if people got their Bible right for a change. There are condition where He, God, not only sanction divorce but also approves of it under certain conditions.Look at Exodus,chapter 21,10-i1, and if that isn't a God sanctioned divorce you would have to be blind not to see that. So leave Dr. Stanley alone, He is right where God wants him to be. And you preachers of God's word should tend to what God gave you to do,preach His word. Not to be casting your many stones of self-rightiouseness in the House Of God, Shame on you!

Anonymous said...

As long as he does not remarry, there is nothing wrong with him remaining pastor. However, he is almost 77 years old, and I wonder what will happen to this church when he retires and/or dies. I visited that church for an extended period of time, and that church is centered around In Touch and the TV broadcast. I feel that church will shrivel up and decline when Dr. Stanley retires.

Anonymous said...

People forget that in a relationship such as marriage there are two people involved. No one can control or make decisions for the other person. How is Mr. Stanley supposed to keep his wife from leaving him and filing for divorce? She is free to make her own deicsions just as our Father allows us our freedom of choice. Let us have grace for others and be the last to throw stones.

roberta said...

He did not divorce his wife she filed and he did his best to reconcile. that's all that needs to be said let the man continue in his mission to serve God and His Word. His wife is the one that needs to examine her decision.

rod said...

Let us assume that the following is accurate: Adrian Rogers did not want nor seek the divorce; Anna Rogers wanted a divorce because she did not want to be in a full-time ministry. The bottom line is how, in your christian world view, do you determine your priorities. Is is God first, ministry 2nd, and family 3rd, or God 1st, family 2nd, and ministry 3rd, etc. I don't believe God leads us to violate what He tells us in scripture. I can only wonder if he had told Anna at the very beginning that their family was more important than his ministry and resigned, that God may had honored that faith and worked in both of their hearts so that at this point in time, they could be happily married, and in full time ministry. Sometimes we don't give God an opportunity to do miraculous things. I lot of ifs and maybes. Eventually we will see clearly. Until then, we need to let love and grace rule in our hearts.

Anonymous said...

My wife divorced me. I didn't leave God. He didn't leave me. Dr. Stanley is still growing Christ-like from the pain as I am. Many churches can be hypocritical places. I understand now Rev. 3 about God sick of the luke-warm church.

Anonymous said...

There is only One who is worthy to judge and that is Jesus Christ. We are to love…. period

Trina Clark said...

God's gifts and his calling are without repentance. Charles Stanley's divorce was factored in from the foundations of the earth.

The scripture that requires a man to have only one wife (even if taken to the extreme of divorce and remarriage) does not apply to Dr. Stanley, because he has still had only one wife.

Regardless, I live under grace, not the law. There is one unforgiveable sin, which is blasphemy of the Holy Spirit. Let him without sin cast the first stone.

Anonymous said...

Pastor Charles Stanley's messages of the word of God was so powerful and had helped me a lot to grow in my christian faith.Back in the Philippines,in 1995,I had been receiving intouch magazines FREE of charge and often heard him preach early in the morning.
I heard of his case few months later and though I was not a Baptist christian,I had that great respect for him and the ministry.I also heard of other known ministers committing adultery etc and later repented and went back serving the Lord.I know that Jesus forgives any sin except the blasphemy of the Holy Spirit and I do believe God knows best what to do in this situation.
I am divorced from me ex-wife and it's so hard in this kind of situation.I understand Pastor Stanley's feeling and my deep sympathy goes to him and his family.It's in this kind of situation where we expect most the our brothers and sisters' in-Christ support and true love and NOT JUDGEMENT/POINTING fingers.Love and compassion should be seen during this kind of crisis and not condemnation.We are hurt,wounded,helpless and weakened and we truely needed your love from the Lord if you really have that God kind of love.
As a result of my separation with my ex-wife,I went back to the world and became worst indulging in all kinds of sins and worldly pleasures.8 long years of living in sin is empty and have so many consequences.But one thing I know is that God isn't yet finished with his plan in my life thus He was able to sustain me even I turned my back away from Him.He just forgave me and gave me a new beginning.I am now at peace with God and myself.I have repented and turned away from all those wickeness and earthly pleasures that I used to have.I felt sorry and I have regrets and remorse for instead of holding on to my faith after my separation with me ex-wife.It was because there were not concerned christians before to support and pray for me.I often heard a lot of condemnation accusing me of many things.I didn't see the compassion and love from those people around me before.Slowly,I drifted away from the faith then too late when I realized I was dep in sin.I thank God for Pastor Stanley for He kept his integrity and faith.He is really a man of God and God keeps him safe under his loving arms.If God has nothing to do with Charles,then God should have snatched his life before but the truth is very clear..God isn't yet finished with Pastor Charles Stanley.That he has to proclaim God's word in this endtimes.Therefore,bros and sisters let us learn to ask God to give us wisdom to understand things like this.Let us be busy preaching the goodnews to the lost world and tell them that God can forgive even the most feared murderers,adulterers,homosexuals,atheist etc etc...amen

Anonymous said...

All authorities in ministry was placed by God and God alone not a church organization, board, church networks, etc. God place and remove it as he pleases even in leadership…sooner or later…remember Saul and David.

What happened in Dr. Stanley’s marriage was definitely caused by spiritual warfare …what would happen in natural world was already happened in spiritual realm. Do you think most of Jesus’ disciples faced or ended up their ministry journey with a happy ending? Though it seemed they had faced challenges and ended in peril in human sense, they were spiritually victorious in God’s eyes. Most Jesus’ disciples especially apostle Paul did a major damage to the enemy in spiritual realm by preaching the Word instead of busy of pointing finger judging the brethren.

When a man like Dr. Stanley who has been preaching the Word and winning many souls to Christ, he definitely became a prime target to the enemy who diligently would find any loop hole/s (as all of us who are human have them) in his life for revenge. So, the failure of his marriage was as much the failure of all of us as Christian who fail to pray for him.

Dr. Stanley is a man of God and I would continually pray and support him and his ministry. I believe in my heart that no other man in this world could walk in his shoes. Keep preaching…my brother.

John said...

The divorce raises serious questions about his character, especially since even he admitted it had to do with his problems.
That he preaches mostly about self-help, rather than the sovereign grace of God, makes it even worse.
But the clincher is that he promised if he were divorced he would immediately resign as pastor. He didn't. He broke his word.
Please don't quote Matthew 7:1 out of context. We are supposed to watch out for false prophets and we'll know who they are by their fruit (also in Matthew 7).

Anonymous said...

Shame on you John for judging what is a very good preacher and teacher. Dr. Stanley did everything he could to reconcile with his wife. In fact, 7 plus years of working to restore a marriage whereby a woman wanted to violate the covenant that she made before God. See Numbers 30:2, "when a person makes a vow before the Lord or takes an oath to obligate by a pledge, it must not be broken, and must do everything he(she) said."

What about that??? Anyone who condemns Dr. Stanley should be ashamed. After all this time nothing has come out by his ex to implicate him in something worthy of being divorced from, ie. infidelity. So leave Dr. Stanley alone. He is doing the Lord's work, with or without his wife.

Anonymous said...

I am a divorced former Southern Baptist pastor with a Master of Divinity degree having been named the top student in my theological class. I was a senior pastor at a 600 member church and I discovered my wife had been having affairs (one with a drug addict) for 4 years. Some were in person while others were on the internet. I had an intervention with our family and her longtime minister. My family paid $18,000 for a month for her in a Christian clinic. She continued her affairs. Then with the full support of therapists and longtime minister, I asked her to leave using the James Dobson's book "Love Must Be Tough." It was the ticket she wanted and left for good. She divorced me a year later. She even wrote me a letter saying I had more integrity of any man she knows and this was not my fault.

I state all of that because I have been considered a "leper" in Baptist circles. Many ministers have been very kind and compassionate while others want nothing to do with me simply because I am divorced. I have been told that God can forgive me for my sins of divorce. How exactly did I sin in my divorce? Why I am left for dead in Baptist circles? I have a good job with a non-profit now to provide for my family but most churches will not even remotely consider me. I have been told by Baptist leaders to simply consider a different career. In SBC circles, I have found no ministries for divorced ministers. No recovery ministries or active leadership from a convention standpoint. It has been a very discouraging situation. I guess if I had a very successful TV ministry, it would be a completely different story.

Anonymous said...

if anna stanley divorced Charles stanley because of his infidelity then she is within her biblical rights and it is not she who judges him but the Word.

If Charles did not really submit his marriage, his self to Jesus and allow himself to be changed to have the marriage God created for him, then the WOrd judges him.

what caused the marriage to be "broken"?

if Charles blames "childhood problems" then is he practising what he preaches?

we don't know the reasons for why anna divorced charles - after 7 years -
do you really think this wife lightly did what she did?
there is some issue and usually it has to do with affection misplaced. infidelity is not necessarily sexual but flirting, wanting attention from others, opening oneself to another in conversation and cultivating an intimacy of emotional needs with someone other than one's husband or wife.
I really do not think that anna came to her decision lightly.
If charles or anna sinned, it is not people who judge but the WOrd..the Word plainly says
"thou shall not committ adultry, thou shall not covet, " etc.

if the Atlanta church is covering up the facts of the separation, the divorce, etc. then they will be judged by the Word.
of course people can judge others not to demonize but to correct and bear witness to the stndard of God's truth in the WORD.
when someone lies, don't we all say, "that is wrong. what you did is wrong.. lying is wrong and you are wrong to lie."?
The Word is our guide and the "lamp at our feet" guiding us. We are not to create rules - only what the Word says - we are not to change the Word of the Bible.

Harry said...

Hey anonymous,
If the SBC does'nt want you then ask God where he wants you. If what you said about your divorce is true then there is no sin, believe it or not Baptist don't have the God thing totally in the bag for themselvs though many believe so. God can still use you.

As far as Dr. Stanley goes nobody knows what is in his heart but God and I believe if God wanted him to step down he would.

Anonymous said...

It is my experience in observing the breakup of a number of marriages - "christian" one's to boot - that it takes TWO people to make a strong marriage, but it only takes ONE to mess one up....If indeed, one party chooses to go a different way, FOR WHATEVER REASON, you do damage to the other. I have witnessed ONE party making choices that leave the other high and dry. Does GOD have these victims in HIS hands, of course HE does. I have seen the back-side of these situations and know that God indeed blesses those who stay faithful and move forward seeking to stay "In His Will", despite the others choices. What is more interesting is to see the broken/fractured lives of the leaving partner. Not once have their lives been blessed. God does not bless rebellion and I have found that, in general, there is, indeed, an attitude of rebellion in the leavers. I have also noticed that in the christian world, we are so quick the "spread the blame around". I have found that sometimes the victims only blame, is that they married "poorly" - someone with emotional problems that may or may not have been evident at the time of "I DO". But isn't that what marriage is all about, seeking to work through things in a marriage. We all do this, but sometimes ONE PARTY just wants to call it quits. This is all anecdotal, of course, but just some observations.

Linda said...

The news of Dr.Stanley's divorce by today's standards of reporting is "old news" yet the impact and implications will continue to be "revelent news" indefinately!

I have been divorced twice. I married "until death do us part" the first time at age 18. The first affair by my husband came in the second year. I forgave him. Vows are unconditional! 16+ years later, multiple affairs, other children born, and continued forgiveness, I was left to raise our two children! Divorce was forced on me even though I was willing to allow God to work it out. It took many years to recover and GOD used my experiences in helping others. Our church offered a program called Divorce Recovery and I was one of the lecturer's and group leaders for five years. 12 years after my first divorce, I remarried. Blended families, second time around bring a whole set of "additional problems". It only lasted a little over 5 years and again, even though I was committed to the "marriage vow", it ended in divorce!

FYI we do not "get out of problems", we just "change" the problems because we're ALL broken! Forgiveness is an action word that is on going. Commitment to the marriage by both parties keeps the "enemy" satan at bay. Christian or not, pastor or layman, educated or not, young or old, male or female, origin or culture, anyone can fall prey to that illusive "greener on the other side" myth!

It is not about "who" is divorced it is about "how" God will use that for the glory of His Kingdom! It is "satan" who benefits when he can cause us to "miss the message"! God created marriage and HE also is the author of reconcilliation!

The "shame" of failure,is a very powerful tool used by satan to attack and attempt to destroy us in our hearts and minds! "Unmet expectations" are the lethal "foxes" that steal our ability to see beyond our own wants!

I continue to ask God for wisdom and pray that I will not miss the opportunity to allow my experiences to make a difference in my "present" and also be an encouragement in another persons life!

There is NOTHING more impactful than knowing you are not alone in the challenges of life!

GOD is all knowing and all powerful! HE has a purpose in all our life experiences! Therefore, it is MORE IMPORTANT to look to GOD and eagerly watch as HIS GLORY IS REVEALED in all things!

Life is a series of actions and reactions. We cannot control "the action" but we CAN control how we REACT!

Dr.Stanley, nor ANYONE ELSE, who stood at the ALTER - SAYING "I DO", thought they would ultimately end up "DIVORCED"!

Praise God, we have our Heavenly Father, who is there to wrap HIS arms around us in our human-ness that he already KNEW about before the Creation of us ALL!

Nothing makes satan more excited than being able to take credit for destroying as many marriages as he can!

There is no "higher" standard for anyone. We are all charged with "accountability". It takes two to be joined together, man and woman, and they become ONE in the eyes of GOD and MAN! HOWEVER, we must remember that it only takes ONE to tear that down in the EYES OF MAN and our COURT SYSTEM!

My prayer is for all "marriages" present and future! Ultimately, I believe that if "the couple" were alone on a deserted island, "they" would figure out how to reconcile all of their differences!

Dr. Stanley's divorce is not any more or any less than any other broken marriage - they all hurt! It is the loving hand of GOD that matters most, that HE can restore us and gives us HOPE for tomorrow!

If you are married, put YOUR marriage on GOD'S ISLAND, pray for the "hedge of protection" and hold tight to each other! If you are single, take all the above to heart if you are blessed with a marriage in the future!

Anonymous said...

It was a beautiful day in the summer of 1983 when I heard the sermon that would change me forever. I still remember looking out the window of my car and listening to this guy thunder on about the majesty and awesomeness of God. It was like I had been hit by a bolt of lightning from above. This was the first time I had heard Dr. Stanley and the Lord used this sermon to draw me away from postmodernism and liberalism, something that had been crammed down my throat by a professor at my college. I was never the same after this. Yes, I had heard Swindoll and MacArthur and other great men who are now some of my heroes. But at this point in my life it was Dr. Stanley that God used to draw me away from bad teaching and get me back into the scriptures.
I don't know what all happened between Dr.Stanley and his wife. It saddens me. For a long time I quit listening to Dr. Stanley because I was so confused by his divorce. But recently I have been experiencing some severe trials and have found myself angry with God over disappointments I've had, losing my joy and sense of direction. I found myself becoming bitter and depressed. I knew I needed to repent but was caught up in my own world of self-pity. I found a sermon by Dr. Stanley on the web and listened to it. The sermon was about bowing down to God and accepting His will. I soon found myself on my knees repenting and confessing my sin and my need of God's guidance again. The depression began to lift and joy returned. It was the Lord doing this work thru Dr. Stanley. I know the difference between condemnation and conviction.This was indeed the sweet conviction of the Lord leading me to repentance. I know this awesome God of mine and how lovingly He breaks us and draws us back to Him. For some reason He chose to use Dr. Stanley once again in my life. I'm still baffled and saddened by what Dr. Stanley has gone thru. But God is still using him.

Anonymous said...

So I guess if you are a talented preacher and teacher, it doesn't much matter what your personal life looks like. As long as you are drawing people closer to God through your words, forget about the whole integrity thing. As some have stated, Anna Stanley had a hard time being a pastor's wife, and being a partner in ministry. Is it really that hard to understand? I would have loved to see Charles take a sabbatical to pray about where God would have them both serve, not just him. To put God as a priority over everything else doesn't mean you have to have an international ministry and pastor a megachurch. There just may be other places they both could have served and kept the marriage intact. Being a pastor's wife, I would hope my husband would take into consideration my feelings if I expressed some burnout or a desire to leave the ministry. It's a team effort in many ways and couples have to find a way to serve that fits them both, not just serving the ego of one.

Anonymous said...

First I want to say how sorry I am for Dr. Stanley and Anna having to deal with a divorce. But fast forwarding to the present time, I have listened to Dr. Stanley over the radio and also watch him preach over the television. And I have to say, that you can see the genuine and pure love that Dr. Stanley has for our Lord and Savior. The way he brings God's word to us is full of love and caring and I just feel he has to be touching a lot of hearts, minds and souls. I love Dr. Stanley for loving our Heavenly Father so very much.

Anonymous said...

"Lord we know that you desperately love Charles and Anna Stanley, and we ask you to heal and comfort their hearts, putting you first above all else. Please draw them to yourself, and then to one another in a spirit of love, mutual forgiveness, and commitment to you first, and then re-commitment to one another. Thank you Lord!"

Anonymous said...

That prayer was perfect! Thank you to the one who posted it! It is my prayer for the Stanley's as well!

I do believe C. Stanley should have stepped down and took care of his wife!
He should have worked on his marriage for as long as it took instead of preaching to the world about all the things HE himself was not doing properly within his own family!

C. Stanley chose to marry, therefore, much of his time would be devoted to his wife and future family.
God commands the husband to take
care of his wife and family. My heart went out to Anna when she said their problems go unresolved! That NEVER should have happened! C.S should have RESOLVED problems in their marriage BEFORE anything else AND IF HE STEPPED DOWN FROM
THE MINISTRY (which was the BIBLICAL thing to do) WHEN HE FIRST STARTED HAVING PROBLEMS, HE PROBABLY WOULD HAVE NEVER BEEN DIVORCED!
If CS spent quality time working on his marriage and investing in his wife, he would have had BETTER books to write, BETTER sermons to preach, but LATER, when his marriage was stronger! OR MAYBE ANNA COULD NOT HANDLE ALL OF THIS HUGE MINISTRY, God would have honored CS in taking care of his wife and working together in a way they BOTH could handle! Did Charles give Anna a chance? Did he just ask her to come back or did he say I'll work with you and we'll figure this out together? I doubt he was willing to sacrifice all his crowds to meet her needs! Looks like he didn't have the TIME to devote to Anna, because he was too busy with all his listeners and appointments, he was too busy with HIMSELF! Doesn't sound like someone devoted to serve God when he's neglecting his wife's needs the same time he's preaching to the world! God can use anyone and anything to accomplish His will, so just because folks are learning from CS and making good decisions because of his books and sermons, that's ALL about God, NOT cs!!!

We believers NEED godly and obedient leaders, and we need them to admit when they do something wrong and TAKE the right actions, for the world to see. PERFECTION belongs ONLY to GOD! Everyone knows and understands human beings fall and sin. We need to show the world the GOD that we go to when we fall, the God that NEVER fails as we do. We want people to trust in the GOD who is our LORD and SAVIOR, not put their trust in MAN!

Folks are so quick to say, "Don't judge"! So they think we all should always turn a blind eye and never speak out when a Christian brother is in sin! That's not biblical, and that's why Christians have become so liberal and immoral. God tells us to discipline within the church. He tells us to go to our brother when they're in sin.

We need to love the Stanleys, pray for them, AND encourage them to do the right thing according to the Word of God! The church is not "RAISING the STANDARD" by allowing a divorced man to continue in this ministry, is there not any WISE godly leader out there anymore?? God is the one who set the standard. He is the judge. We still need to discern and handle sin in our churches! God tells us how! CS is not this perfect man of God! He is not where he obviously should be.

I pray Charles Stanley becomes a testimony and witness to the world by his EXAMPLE. I pray he reconciles with Anna, even if she won't have him back. I pray he SHOWS his love to her rather than just asking her to come back into his BUSY crowded life of ministry which was probably overwhelming to her for so many years!

Anonymous said...

It is simple. She did not want to be married to him and did him a favor and divorced him. Live and let live. I hope that she is happy. It must be very difficult to be as perfect as Dr Stanley. I can only imagine how relieved she is to feel human without the pressure of such unatainable perfection he promotes. He is a very ambitious man. Ambitious men often put their ambitions ahead of others expecially their significant others. Church or no church this kind of drive leaves little room to give to your wife.

Anonymous said...

There has been a lot of good things said in these comments, but I have noticed that a lot of comments are based on speculation of what "might have" happened, "could have" happened, "probably was" happening, or what "usually is the case" in their failing marriage -- I humbly suggest that instead of trying to draw conclusions about who was at fault, why don't we leave the judging to God? I know that there is a place for Christians to "judge" - lovingly, in the light of Scripture and with the guidance of the Holy Spirit, but in cases where the real details of the case are not known, particularly by the person doing the judging, such as many of these comment-writers, I believe it is better to withhold judgment and "give a blessing instead." If we are supposed to "bless your enemies," as Jesus said, how much more should we bless those who have been faithful ministers of the gospel? We know they are not perfect, and not without failures and sins, as are all of us, but most of the time, these faithful ministers are probably much more above reproach than so many of us. Why don't we focus on what we know for sure -- like the extent to which it appears Dr. Stanley did try to save his marriage, the tremendous soul-searching and anguish he went through, and the extent to which he earnestly sought God for many months (years?), seeking earnestly the will of God alone and on His knees. The extent to which he failed in these endeavors, God only knows, but we should not use speculation to judge the things that we simply do not know. What we DO know is that he is a very humble, God-fearing man whom God continues to use in a very mighty way. There are not many like him in today's society giving such a clarion call - both to believers and unbelievers alike - to love God with all your heart, soul and strength and to obey the Word, and to rise up as God's people to pray fervantly for our nation. I myself and my entire church have recently been so greatly blessed and challenged by his 4th of July message re. the state of the union in America today, and the call to 140 days of prayer. Instead of judging, let's just leave it to God and rejoice and thank God that He is still able to use this man in a mighty way, both in the Church, and to the people of America. May God continue to bless and use Charles Stanley mightily!!!!

Carol said...

I whole-heartedly agree with "Anonymous's" comment of Wed., Aug. 25, 2010.

Simply stated, we just do not know the factual details of Dr. Stanley's divorce, i.e., we do not know the content of both of their hearts, whether it was CFS's "infidelity" or Anna being "overwhelmed by a large ministry." WE SIMPLY DO NOT KNOW THE 100% TRUTH, therefore, WE MUST RESERVE JUDGMENT and know that it should only be left up to God to judge the hearts of both at the appropriate time.

In the meantime, if I may humbly express my own personal feelings here, I believe Dr. Stanley has and continues to do the works of God and BEAR A LOT OF FRUIT. He has personally changed my life and further opened my eyes to the love of God and the Truth of His Word.

Anonymous said...

As a pastor myself, I have stood on the reality that my family is my first ministry. I personally feel that we in ministry should do anything and everything, short of sin, we can to hold our families together. I am commenting after reading an account of the court filing history of Dr. Stanley's predicament. In my experience no divorce is every simply one sided. But it does beg the question, If he would have stepped out of "church" ministry to handle "family" ministry would he have held tighter to his integrity of belief and maybe kept from being divorced? Then stepped back into "church" ministry without the "ghost" of blogs like this haunting the rest of his life.
The simplest definition I have found for Christian integrity is found in Matthew 5:37 (NIV) Jesus himself reminds us;
"Simply let your 'Yes' be 'Yes,' and your 'No,' 'No'; anything beyond this comes from the evil one."

Sorry if biblical accountability is not politically correct today but ultimately the truth is the truth and that is Jesus.

Anonymous said...

Divorce isn't so much what the problem is...even though that is a "huge" problem. Some are divorced completley against their will. The biggest problem is remarriage after divorce. Remarriage is adultery as long as you have a living spouse. Nobody seems to have mentioned that....oh wait....!..that's because it's never taught in the churches! And the churches are now filled with divorced and remarried pastors and christians. People...you can't say lifelong committed vows in front of God and witnesses to 2 or 3...and so on.. different people and expect God to honor it! God makes the rules about marriage and fuses the two into "one flesh". It's called a covenant and it is unbreakable by man and his laws. God says the two are now one and let NO ONE put asunder. That's why you are to remain single or be reconciled if divorced. It gives God a chance to turn hearts and reconcile the couple. Divorce does serve a purpose as far as removing oneself from an unbearable and dangerous situation. Remarriage serves to hinder reconciliation.

So as far as Mr. Stanley goes, he is not sinning if he does not re-marry another person...other than his covenant wife.

I know I will get flack for this...always do, but I'm just going by scripture and not mankind's desire to switch spouses because the going got tough. Just ask Esau how seriously God takes vows.

Oh, and Mr. Stanly probably should honor his word about stepping down if divorce happened. Not because of anything wrong, but because he said he would. Let your yes be yes and your no be no.

Oh, if only all of us would honor our word. Divorce would never happen in the first place and our churches would not be in this mess!

Anonymous said...

I am very glad that Dr, Stanley did not sept down. His preaching has seen me through some very rough times, one of those being a very unexpected affair between my husband and my best friend. He asked me to leave and told me it would only be for a short time. I DID NOT KNOW OF THE AFFAIR AND COULD NOT AFFORD THE PLACE WE WERE LIVING AT THE TIME. I found out later that he moved her into our home three days later and he had had no intention of reconciliation. Two monts later I was served with divorce papers which I contested for over a year until I ran out of money. I was shunned by many Christians, even though they did not really knows us nor the circumstances.It takes two to make a marriage but only one to make a divorce, esp. with "no fault divorce". My mother died last year but 15 years before had a sudden life threatening situation in which she came extremely cose to death. I do not know for sure if my mother died a Chritian but I do know she started comming to church with me and she listened to Dr, Stanley frequently and read the In Touch magazine.I am glad it was free because my mother was destitute and could not have afforded it if you had to pay. She was never able to give a donation and it still kept comming for the rest of her life. She also was a single mother who was very poor and was only two months older than Dr. Stanley. She very much related to Dr. Stanley and his mother. My brother is now going through an unwanted divorce started by his wife. It has left him in a tailspin and he is contemplating suicide. The senior pastor of his large church has told my brother he is not welcome there anyloner, even though he does not really know my brother nor the circumstances. My brother has very low self esteem and the seperation and the divorce and esp the shunning of this pastor has just devastated him and is making him feel like he should kill himself..He listens to Dr. Stanley and I hope that he sees other Christians also are in this situation and he can recover and go on as they have . I would very much like it and hope that Dr. Stanley would preach on and write a book re. divorce. I also would like his ex-wife to come forward and tell her side of the story as she is the one who initiated the seperation and the divorce. As I said before, I am very,very glad that Dr. Stanley did not step down and he continues for many, many years in his ministry. If it is true about his not letting divorced people on his staff and I also heard that he would not allow any kind of classes, support groups, etc.about divorce and recovery process taught or held in his church before his seperation, now sees that it is very much needed.

rick said...

I will preface this remark with the fact that I grew up in and around the Church. I wasn't, however, Born Again, until my child was conceived and I realized the great responsibility I now had and did not want to "go it alone" and do it in my own strength. My marriage has been fraught with ups and downs- especially when I devoted regular time to spend in my bible. The re-affirmation of my faith and a concerted effort to practice it- led, in my opinion, to real warfare. It is written, "For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms."

I recognize the fact that I am a sinner, and God's Grace is sufficient for me.

I recognize that I will sin again.
I recognize that I will be sanctified as time goes on.

I recognize that God's Spirit lives in me, and the proof is in the conviction when I "miss the mark".

I recognize that no single sin is smaller than the other.

I recognize and LOVE God for his eternal Grace and love for me- regardless of my shortcomings, he draws me back with open arms.

I recognize that God is my Creator and Father- In the way I love my son, regardless of what he does (he will always be my son and I will love him)- even when he hurts me or causes pain for himself. If I am a sinner with the righteousness of a lepers wraps, how much more does the Father's perfect love mean to us?

With the recognition of the above, I believe that no one can know another's heart - this includes one's spouse. " The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?" Only God knows my heart. If this is the case, how could I judge or suppose to understand the condition of another? All I care about with regard to Dr. Stanley is that the Lord loves him and he loves the Lord as evidenced by his fruits. "A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit."

My thought as a poor sinner is that my heart goes out to Dr. Stanley and his wife. Only a fool would believe that Dr. Stanley does not still love his wife and pray for her. Should he stay in his ministry - I am not worthy to decide this. I am sure he has been prayerful in this, so I am also sure God will guide him. If he is in submission to God, what else matters? How did the religious leaders of the Old Testament interpret the Law? Where did they go wrong? What was asked of Jesus regarding the law? These are questions every Christian needs to examine. I was never humble, now I am being humbled and I praise God for it - even if the outcome in this world is not pleasurable or comfortable. I am being broken on the rock, and loving every bit of it. Without the process I am experiencing, I don't think I would have come to the Lord in the way I am coming to Him today.

If another Christian can witness to me based on his personal experience and bear testimony on how the Lord used this experience/trial in their life- I feel I get a qualified testimony. If he hasn't shared the same trial as me, how can he say, "I understand..."?

I don't seem to remember many great men God used in the Bible who were without sin.... I believe the one who was called to this was God himself as Christ. And we judged Him as prophesied while he was blameless and sinless. We are no better today. It's time to put away the ritual and religious tassels- stop being miserable comforters, and praise God while supporting and encouraging our brothers and sisters in the Lord. We are to show our light in a dark world.

In summation, I doubt whether any of us can tell how God will use this in Dr. Stanley's life.... why not trust God and look forward to it in prayer and supplication.

rick said...

I will preface this remark with the fact that I grew up in and around the Church. I wasn't, however, Born Again, until my child was conceived and I realized the great responsibility I now had and did not want to "go it alone" and do it in my own strength. My marriage has been fraught with ups and downs- especially when I devoted regular time to spend in my bible. The re-affirmation of my faith and a concerted effort to practice it- led, in my opinion, to real warfare. It is written, "For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms."

I recognize the fact that I am a sinner, and God's Grace is sufficient for me.

I recognize that I will sin again.
I recognize that I will be sanctified as time goes on.

I recognize that God's Spirit lives in me, and the proof is in the conviction when I "miss the mark".

I recognize that no single sin is smaller than the other.

I recognize and LOVE God for his eternal Grace and love for me- regardless of my shortcomings, he draws me back with open arms.

With the recognition of the above, I believe that no one can know another's heart - this includes one's spouse. " The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?" Only God knows my heart. If this is the case, how could I judge or suppose to understand the condition of another? All I care about with regard to Dr. Stanley is that the Lord loves him and he loves the Lord as evidenced by his fruits. "A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit."

My thought as a poor sinner is that my heart goes out to Dr. Stanley and his wife. Only a fool would believe that Dr. Stanley does not still love his wife and pray for her. Should he stay in his ministry - I am not worthy to decide this. I am sure he has been prayerful in this, so I am also sure God will guide him. If he is in submission to God, what else matters? How did the religious leaders of the Old Testament interpret the Law? Where did they go wrong? What was asked of Jesus regarding the law? These are questions every Christian needs to examine. I was never humble, now I am being humbled and I praise God for it - even if the outcome in this world is not pleasurable or comfortable. I am being broken on the rock, and loving every bit of it. Without the process I am experiencing, I don't think I would have come to the Lord in the way I am coming to Him today.

I don't seem to remember many great men God used in the Bible who were without sin.... I believe the one who was called to this was God himself as Christ. And we judged Him as prophesied while he was blameless and sinless. We are no better today. It's time to put away the ritual and religious tassels- stop being miserable comforters, and praise God while supporting and encouraging our brothers and sisters in the Lord. We are to show our light in a dark world.

In summation, I doubt whether any of us can tell how God will use this in Dr. Stanley's life.... why not trust God and look forward to it in prayer and supplication.

rick said...

I will preface this remark with the fact that I grew up in and around the Church. I wasn't, however, Born Again, until my child was conceived and I realized the great responsibility I now had and did not want to "go it alone" and do it in my own strength. My marriage has been fraught with ups and downs- especially when I devoted regular time to spend in my bible. The re-affirmation of my faith and a concerted effort to practice it- led, in my opinion, to real warfare. It is written, "For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms."

I recognize the fact that I am a sinner, and God's Grace is sufficient for me.

I recognize that I will sin again.
I recognize that I will be sanctified as time goes on.

I recognize that God's Spirit lives in me, and the proof is in the conviction when I "miss the mark".

I recognize that no single sin is smaller than the other.

I recognize and LOVE God for his eternal Grace and love for me- regardless of my shortcomings, he draws me back with open arms.

With the recognition of the above, I believe that no one can know another's heart - this includes one's spouse. " The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?" Only God knows my heart. If this is the case, how could I judge or suppose to understand the condition of another? All I care about with regard to Dr. Stanley is that the Lord loves him and he loves the Lord as evidenced by his fruits. "A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit."

My thought as a poor sinner is that my heart goes out to Dr. Stanley and his wife. Only a fool would believe that Dr. Stanley does not still love his wife and pray for her. Should he stay in his ministry - I am not worthy to decide this. I am sure he has been prayerful in this, so I am also sure God will guide him. If he is in submission to God, what else matters? How did the religious leaders of the Old Testament interpret the Law? Where did they go wrong? What was asked of Jesus regarding the law? These are questions every Christian needs to examine. I was never humble, now I am being humbled and I praise God for it - even if the outcome in this world is not pleasurable or comfortable. I am being broken on the rock, and loving every bit of it. Without the process I am experiencing, I don't think I would have come to the Lord in the way I am coming to Him today.

I don't seem to remember many great men God used in the Bible who were without sin.... I believe the one who was called to this was God himself as Christ. And we judged Him as prophesied while he was blameless and sinless. We are no better today. It's time to put away the ritual and religious tassels- stop being miserable comforters, and praise God while supporting and encouraging our brothers and sisters in the Lord. We are to show our light in a dark world.

In summation, I doubt whether any of us can tell how God will use this in Dr. Stanley's life.... why not trust God and look forward to it in prayer and supplication.

rick said...

I will preface this remark with the fact that I grew up in and around the Church. I wasn't, however, Born Again, until my child was conceived and I realized the great responsibility I now had and did not want to "go it alone" and do it in my own strength. My marriage has been fraught with ups and downs- especially when I devoted regular time to spend in my bible. The re-affirmation of my faith and a concerted effort to practice it- led, in my opinion, to real warfare. It is written, "For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms."

I recognize the fact that I am a sinner, and God's Grace is sufficient for me.

I recognize that I will sin again.
I recognize that I will be sanctified as time goes on.

I recognize that God's Spirit lives in me, and the proof is in the conviction when I "miss the mark".

I recognize that no single sin is smaller than the other.

I recognize and LOVE God for his eternal Grace and love for me- regardless of my shortcomings, he draws me back with open arms.

With the recognition of the above, I believe that no one can know another's heart - this includes one's spouse. " The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?" Only God knows my heart. If this is the case, how could I judge or suppose to understand the condition of another? All I care about with regard to Dr. Stanley is that the Lord loves him and he loves the Lord as evidenced by his fruits. "A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit."

My thought as a poor sinner is that my heart goes out to Dr. Stanley and his wife. Only a fool would believe that Dr. Stanley does not still love his wife and pray for her. Should he stay in his ministry - I am not worthy to decide this. I am sure he has been prayerful in this, so I am also sure God will guide him. If he is in submission to God, what else matters?

I don't seem to remember many great men God used in the Bible who were without sin.... I believe the one who was called to this was God himself as Christ. And we judged Him as prophesied while he was blameless and sinless. We are no better today. It's time to put away the ritual and religious tassels- stop being miserable comforters, and praise God while supporting and encouraging our brothers and sisters in the Lord. We are to show our light in a dark world.

In summation, I doubt whether any of us can tell how God will use this in Dr. Stanley's life.... why not trust God and look forward to it in prayer and supplication.

rick said...

I recognize the fact that I am a sinner, and God's Grace is sufficient for me.
I recognize that I will sin again.
I recognize that I will be sanctified as time goes on.
I recognize that God's Spirit lives in me, and the proof is in the conviction when I "miss the mark".
I recognize that no single sin is smaller than the other.
I recognize and LOVE God for his eternal Grace and love

With the recognition of the above, I believe that no one can know another's heart - this includes one's spouse. " The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?" Only God knows my heart. If this is the case, how could I judge or suppose to understand the condition of another? All I care about with regard to Dr. Stanley is that the Lord loves him and he loves the Lord as evidenced by his fruits. "A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit."

My thought as a poor sinner is that my heart goes out to Dr. Stanley and his wife. Only a fool would believe that Dr. Stanley does not still love his wife and pray for her. Should he stay in his ministry - I am not worthy to decide this. I am sure he has been prayerful in this, so I am also sure God will guide him. If he is in submission to God, what else matters?

I don't seem to remember many great men God used in the Bible who were without sin.... I believe the one who was called to this was God himself as Christ. And we judged Him as prophesied while he was blameless and sinless. We are no better today. It's time to put away the ritual and religious tassels- stop being miserable comforters, and praise God while supporting and encouraging our brothers and sisters in the Lord. We are to show our light in a dark world.

In summation, I doubt whether any of us can tell how God will use this in Dr. Stanley's life.... why not trust God and look forward to it in prayer and supplication.

Anonymous said...

A comment made by Anna Stanley that her husband chose his priorities early in their marriage and she was not one of them, made me sad. He may be a gifted orator and author, but God called him to be a husband first, after calling him to be a Child of God. His 'work' (ministry) must take second place to his wife and family.
I question what kind of example that is setting to the marriages and families under his spiritual care.
I don't feel the issue is about whether or not divorced people can continue in ministry, but rather what caused the divorce in the first place!
Too often prestige and power can distract from the God given responsibilities of men to care for those closest to him - his family.

Anonymous said...

To respond to the comment from "The Reverend Doctor"....

"Dr Stanley did nothing wrong. His wife became possessed by Lucifer and left him. He had no control over this. I have also had such an experience. Those that criticize him for this are doing the Devil's work in being an "accuser of the brethren."

I find it disturbing, "Rev Doc", that you automatically blame Mrs. Stanley since she was the one who filed for divorce. That reminds me of the Scripture where the woman who was caught in the act of adultery was brought before Jesus - but she is standing there alone. The man she was with should have been there, too. He was probably in the crowd with a stone in his hand, eagerly awaiting to throw it. The point is, why lay all the blame on Mrs. Stanley and none on her ex-husband? I don't know what happened and don't need to know. But to blame JUST her sounds a bit judgmental on your part, Rev Doc. Don't be so quick to put ALL the blame on Mrs. Stanley.

Also -- would you have called John the Baptist an "accuser of the brethren" for telling Herod Antipas he shouldn't have married his brother's wife? There IS a difference between judging someone and telling them the truth in love.

You also write, "I have also had such an experience" - which sounds like you're dealing with bitterness from your own divorce. Just because your ex-wife chose to leave you, doesn't mean that every woman who files for divorce is like her.

I'm also a survivor of divorce. Twelve years ago my ex had an affair with a married woman 14 years his junior. He made the decision to leave his family AND his faith to be with this woman. But in order for me to maintain custody of our child (I didn't want her to live with her dad and his girlfriend while he was still married to me), I had to file the papers for divorce. For doing that, my church shunned me and my daughter (8 1/2 at the time). I thought my life and ministry as a Christian were over. My daughter is now 22 and is not a Christian. I believe the church shunning had a major part in that.

Then four months after our divorce became final, I was diagnosed with cancer. That got a few comments from those who thought this was God's judgment on me for filing for divorce. But at no time did anyone say anything about my ex-husband's adultery!

But God got me through all of it. I've been in remission for 11 years and now I'm involved in an outreach ministry to public housing residents, using the gifts and callings God gave me to share His love. I feel complete and whole in Him and Rev Doc, I'm praying this for you, too.

I guess I shared all this to say that I'm supporting Mrs. Stanley. I've read that she didn't feel her husband chose her as a top priority in his life. Maybe she got tired of her husband putting his ministry first when he should have put God first, family second, and ministry third or further on down the line in priorities.

Anonymous said...

Biblical Illeteracy is our human curse and should be our most secret shame!!! Whatever problems or differances Dr. Charles Stanley and his wife Anna had is between them and God!!! and to those who try and insist that Dr. Stanley placed a different biblical principal upon himself I must say you are truely showing your lack of the scriptures. Jesua (JESUS)placed his cloak around Israel (this was a symbol and fact at the time his proclamation of his being married to the people and the land and the faith of Israel) Jesus had to divorce himself from Israel but will once again reclaim her. It is only southern baptist stuffiness and earthly ways of man that would try to make the sadness of Anna Stanley's decision to divorce Dr. Stanley an excuse to tarnish his fitness to continue his efforts for GOD...Jesus made it clear to his first Disciples that if their flesh burns for (Wives,Women ie: SEX) that they should not follow him and Jesus has made it clear that we must put our love for him above all else and he specifically spelled it out that love for GOD is above love for wife,children,and all possesions.

God instructs that we are not to judge lest we be judged this is backed up by many clear lessons and directives that it is only GOD who has right to vengance and judgement. When you hold any animosity or effect any cause or action against Dr. Charles Stanley or Anna Stanley or the woman who was ostrasized from her own church you are stepping in the way of GOD and you are offending him and doing this will be held against you when you are having to stand before GOD and your own final judgement...But if you want to be like that...Well, I guess GOD may decide that you can pay him later only problem...that later will be too late for you

steve said...

How can we truly know the whole situation with Dr Stanley?Only the Lord can see what is in our hearts.Who am I to judge when I am so sinful and need to seek God's forgiveness daily.If I am really saved shouldn't my focus be on my wonderful Lord and saviour not this very sad situation.I Pray for the Lord to Bless Dr Stanley as he has been a great encouragement to me ln my walk with the Lord.As a side issue what Sin is the Lord calling you and I to repent from this new year I pray the Lord Jesus will give us the grace and strength to follow him always.

Anonymous said...

Pure and simple: Charles Stanley is an opportunistic hypocrite.

None of us ever really knows the full story of anyone's divorce. All are tragic, and I think God hates it because it causes everyone so much pain.

What inflames me about Charles Stanley's situation, though, is that he was president of his denomination's leadership twice. During that time, I would guess that the policies he upheld regarding divorce caused many faultless and faithful ministers to be ejected from their pulpits.

It didn't matter that the minister was in the same boat Stanley would one day find himself. Rules were rules, and I would guess that Stanley abided by them...until they were going to be applied to him.

I was in Atlanta when all the hubbub was going on. Two of my closest friends left after they said they saw an arrogant side to Stanley that they never knew existed.

I was also listening to a radio interview when Stanley made a comment on why he didn't step down like he had promised. His response was horribly arrogant. It was something like, "Well, some people thought they knew better than me..." What?!

I think the earlier blogger had it right. If he'd had as big a following as Stanley, he could have continued in his pulpit. And that, I am convinced, is pathetic. Shame on those (like Stanley, his elders, and his remaining flock) who think the rules are just for the little people.

Anonymous said...

We don't know the details. It's not our place to judge without them. If they wanted us to know, we would. Doctor Stanley's has had a great ministry. Anna divorced him. He looks like a Godley man to me. I don't know much about her. He could've stepped down if God told him to. Seems there are alot of people in here that want to dictate what God's saying to a person. I daresare you're no better than Charles Stanley. I daresay your salvation is no better than his lol. I daresay your relation with and understanding of God's word is no matter than yours. I came here out of curiosity to see if there were any facts surrounding their divorce. There aren't other than the fact that she filed and got it. The rest is just speculation both waysa; nothing more.

Alan said...

I was born and raised Catholic. I was confirmed a Catholic and I will be Catholic till the day I die. But, the irony here is that I listen and Watch Dr. Stanley's sermon when ever i can (Which is Mon-Fri EVERY MORNING. Charles Stanely has done more for my Christian life than I can thank him for. I TRULY believe there are people who are literally "touched" by GOD. Who are TRULY men of GOD. People like the pope, Billy Graham and Charles Stanley. Dr. Stanley has brought me back from despair to a life I never dreamed of having. Dr. Stanley is a great man and a wonderful teacher. I thank GOD that HE put Dr. Stanley in my life.

Anonymous said...

I just don't understand some of these comments that Dr.Stanley should have left the ministry because his wife divorced him. God didn't give Dr. Stanley to Anna Stanley to be a helpmeet. It was the other way around. To say that a man should leave the work God called him to do has to be a calling of God also and God obviously didn't call Dr. Stanley to do that. The first man of creation had his work, caring for the creation God had made, and THEN God gave him someone to work with him, and be a help to him in the work God gave him to do. Dr. Stanley may have his problems, as do all of us, but the responsibility is the woman's to love him, pray for him and do what she can to be a faithful loving wife. For whatever reason, A. was struggling with submission to God in what was evidently a difficult situation for her, and missed the opportunity for the grace of God to meet her, so that she could also help other women who are in similar difficult circumstances. Instead, she chose to go to other sources for help which were no help at all, and ultimately chose the easy way out. If all this was because of an illness, she is to pitied, but God has evidently used this suffering for good in Dr. Stanley's life and has blessed us through it. God's hates divorce. That is God's heart. Those who are like-minded with His heart will hate it, too. Separation may be necessary and there can be obvious reasons for that to happen, but a divorce is insisted upon because of a hardness in a heart, as the Lord said. We have a powerful enemy, and no one is beyond falling into the same trap if one follows the Lord at a distance. I pray that the Lord will bring about a humble and repentant reconciliation between these two souls. I know there would be rejoicing in heaven and earth for sure.

Anonymous said...

Do not judge at least he be judged we dont know what happened this higher prioteries on people in minstries being divorced is not right if they divorced for certain reasons if jesus wanted or wants him to step down thats between them he is a great preacher and has helped me let jesus do for your life dont worry about dr stanley . pray

Jimmy said...

It is evident that these comments hit a nerve with many people, and although many of us have experienced both difficulties in life, it seems to remain that we still have much to learn about how deep and wide and how far the love is of our God...

Although, from a laymens persepctive, it seems that a Pastor is called to a live a life of higher responsibility. Yet Dr. Stanely hold's the office of pastor, still.

God did not allow Moses to enter the promised land because of one act of disobeidiance he committed, even after Moses pleaded with Him.

Joseph's brothers left him for dead, yet God used him to save His people from hunger. However, He picked Judah, not Joseph, as the one to carry the line of the Messiah.

...We have to remember that we only know in part, but once perfection comes then we'll know in full.

Until then, let's pray for Dr. Stanley's healing and that WE show him love that we've all been given. Then, if God wants to use us to move Dr. Stanley to step down or be a pastor, leave it to God. It's all His anyway.

Remember the words of Micah ..."Do justice, have mercy and walk humbly."

stuart said...

to put it simply, pastor stanley has been a very big help to me..i had heard of him for many years but never listened or watched his sermons..i now feel that i know him almost as a friend or mentor..like him, i also went thru a divorce..it was excruciating painful and to be honest it still is and it has been 4 years next week..me and my wife were both christians and attended the same church since we met(1990)..
during our 14th year of marriage she had weight loss surgery..from the time of her surgery until the day she told me she wanted a new life was 14 months. during that time she lost about 150 pounds..to make a long story shorter that was in 2006..we divorced in 2007 and within 8 weeks she was pregnant with the alcoholic neighbor where she had just moved into...since then she is on her 3rd marriage, a couple of shack-ups,met men on the internet for sex a few times, and worse stuff..the reason i bring this up is that i know the pain of divorce and how someones decision can impact ones life.. i forgot to mention that we have 2 children that were affected by all this.to be honest, my pastor and the associate pastor never once talked to me and i feel as others do that the church let me down..i love my church but i feel that pastor stanley is more my pastor than my actual pastor..pastors simply dont know or understand the pains,hurts,and consequences divorce brings..i felt shunned by my own kind..it is hard..pastor stanley understands this, and i believe it makes him a better preacher and pastor..i can feel the hurt in his voice when he talks about divorce, pain, and especially loneliness..i have been divorced 4 years and i couldnt buy a friend..when you are divorced, everyone goes on when you are in neutral...family, friends, your church, your spouse, can all leave you but god never will. my prayer is that god brings healing and joy into anyone who is divorced,divorcing,separated, or even thinking of divorce..especially to all the people who have been hurt by their spouses, especially when the person who hurt them seems to have it made...to paraphrase from pastor stanley...you reap what you sow, more than you sow, and later than you sow..love galatians and romans 12:19...my prayers are with pastor stanley that he heals completely and continues with his ministries, and also to his ex-wife..

Anonymous said...

DR. STANLEY HAS BEEN A BLESSING TO ME AND TO ALOT OF OTHERS. WHATEVER HAPPENED TO HIS MARRIAGE IS BETWEEN HIM ,HIS WIFE AND GOD. I USE TO BELONG TO A CHURCH THAT HAD A GREAT PASTOR THAT EVERYONE LOVED TO LISTEN TO. A BIGGER CHURCH WAS BUILT TO ACCOMIDATE ALL OF THE PEOPLE THAT ATTENDED. PASTURES ARE NOT IMMUNED TO SIN AND HE WAS KICKED OUT OF THE MINISTRY BECAUSE OF UNFAITHFULNESS TO HIS WIFE. THE CHURCH WAS NEVER THE SAME. THE ATTENDANCE WAS LOW AND THE CHURCH IS STRUGGLING TO PAY THE BILLS.I THOUGHT IT WAS AN INJUSTICE NOT TO FORGIVE HIM IF HE REPENTED. ANOTHER GREAT MINISTRY WAS DESTROYED BECAUSE OF UNFORGIVENESS. ANOTHER BATTLE WON BY SATIN. I AM GLAD THAT DR. STANLEY DIDNT RESIGN AND I THINK HIS CONGREGATION SHOULD COME BACK AND FORGIVE HIM INSTEAD OF ACTING LIKE HIPPOCRITS. NO ONE IS SINLESS AND THANK GOD FOR JESUS.

DCT said...

Most of you have not much idea what you are speaking about...a general sense/reading of scripture is fine, but Dr Stanley is NOT who you all think he is...he is NOT some saint who's been persecuted, and he's not a devil either.

I worked there for 10 years, my wife worked there for more than that...many UNGODLY things have gone on there, and some of them WITH Dr Stanley's knowledge and Bobby Schipper's Knowledge too. They have even gone to lengths to cover some of them up and keep them hidden. This is partly due to his poor opinion of certain people, particularly women. (some other groups too)

He has, like any other weak, sinful man, compromised God's word for his own benefit. The things that we saw and endured were not small things.

All this to say, that don't think for a minute that he didn't DO things that he KNEW were wrong in the scripture, for his own benefit.

Sorry if this hurts but what I and my wife witnessed over the years was incredibly wrong.

Shirley said...

Remember That God is Boss! He has the authority! When he returns to earth what will you do, report Dr. Stanley for sinning? Is that how you will benefit? Who will benefit from all this talk about his life and what occurred in his life? Work on your own lives, following Gods word...love! Don't spread the work of satan, hate, anger, rejection, neglect! Satan wants you to leave the word of God etc.
and follow him. What is happening,

about it, spread love, compliment Dr. Staney for his help etc. What did he do to you all to be put down and rejected by so many?

Bette said...

I am sad to hear that Dr. Stanley was divorced. But I don't think I have the right to judge him. His divorce may be one of God's holy plans. I am happy that he doesn't step down.

What I should do is just to listen to Dr. Stanley's sermons, reflect my life and live a godly life.

My ultimate goal is to live out a christian life. I shouldn't be distracted from this goal.

I will keep on watching Dr. Stanley's programmes cos he's a good teacher and preacher.

Jummy said...

Dr Charles Stanley has been a blessing to me and I believe many others. I believe his divorce was a cross he has to carry. The devil just wanted to distract him from what God has called him to do i.e. teach The Word. May God help Dr Stanley and his ex-wife to forgive each other and reconcile someday.

Anonymous said...

Dr Charles Stanley's teachings have been a blessing to me. I feel confused too because of the CS's divorce.
I think that Charles Stanley is a messenger from God.
I think that He is a godly man. He is a human being which means that He is not perfect. We should love and accept him the way He is. We are not the ones to judge him and his wife, only GOD, because we all make mistakes.
As brothers in Christ lets pray for them, and wish them the best. Hope Charles and Anna reconcile some day, and share with us their testimony for the glory of our loving and merciful God!! Amen!!!

Anonymous said...

I am married to a wonderful, godly, quiet, hard working man who is the SS superintendent of our church and teaches a class on marital relationships. This is what the church sees, what happens at home is entirely different. No one knows or would probably believe what goes on in the privacy of our home. He is controlling, abusive, and has sexual sin in his life. He, by his own admission, does not want a close relationship with me. It gets in the way of the things he really wants to do. I have forgiven him and prayed for him repeatedly over the last 38 years. He, in the past, has blamed it partially on "childhood episodes",but now feels that the things he does might not really be wrong. I realized, after the most recent episode, my place as his wife was over 35 years ago and I can no longer support his ministry in the church. It makes me party to a lie and I am very quietly backing out. I say all that to say this: No one know why Anna divorced Charles Stanley and no one knows what happened in their most private marital relationship. I know from experience that a man can preach and teach the word in a way that inspires others, but not live the word at home. I don't know if this even applies to Dr. Stanley, but, again, we just don't know. Anna may have had very good reasons to divorce, but chose not to share them. As for Dr. Stanley stepping down, I think he should honor his word. Even if he doesn't mean it this way, it looks like there could be a little bit of ego involved in staying on. Besides continuing as pastor of his church might not be the best thing GOD has planned for his future even if he is totally innocent. Pray, Pray, Pray for them!

Jessica Bahadi said...

i think that when you are in a crisis, you must seek the face of God, fast and pray. 2 points. No one stays married without both people wanting it. Secondly, pastors aren't perfect. Remember the disciples?
Why would God prefer dr Stanley to be divorced, he said himself that he hates divorces. But he is a forgiving father! Things are just complicated, we don't know why his ex wife didn't want him anymore. He seems so lovely. In marriage, you must learn to forgive. That woman could not forgive. If you can't forgive your neighbour, God won't forgive you.

Jessica Bahadi said...

God hates divorces!! We need to fight the devil because he is destroying our marriage. Don't let the devil fool you, a divorce is not the plan of God. God gave us authority, power and dominion to destroy the work of the devil. a divorce is the work of the devil. We are not fighting against flesh but against spiritual forces of the world of darkness. We are warriors in Jesus Christ.

Ladie said...

I never knew too much about Charles Stanley other than the fact that he continually was a suppoerter for me during my hard times in my life. His encouragement to press on and wealth of knowledge in how to lead others kept me as a dedicated listner. Charles is human too. I know through his mentoring, he would not purposely break Gods laws. This was clearly not a matter that was within his control. He may have taken too much security in his wifes status and lost her emotionally but she reacted without first seeking guidance from God remaining an obedient steward of Christ. They should never have separated. Did he beat her physically? Did he belittle her and torment her mentally? If not and even so, the Bible says that we will find comfort in God and he will be our husband when there is no one for us. Maybe Charles was the one that suffered and was in need. To make him a better and more perfect leader for Christ, would be to remove obsticles preventing him from growing closer to God. Charles Stanley has helped millions of people that he will never come to face in this world. Suffering is not a bad thing. It jut means that God is chipping away at us, molding us to be better stewards for Him than we were before. Thank you Charles for contiually preaching the Word of God and acting as He would have you to.

Anonymous said...

Hey Folks, Brothers and Sisters...
I see this forum (as well as others) have been bantering off track for years. The real issue that should have been addressed from the beginning was FULL DISCLOSURE of the facts, and then public REPENTANCE from both Mr. and Mrs. Stanley, and then what to do to: help, stop or let the chips fall where...

So here we have a dubious problem in cover-up, which has left in its tracks suspicion, corruption, disgrace and on and on but at its core: lingering SIN.

Who's the worst offender here? Obviously the SBC. How and why could I say such a thing? They have power. Eerily similar to the Catholic Church scandals, this power comes in the form of MONEY (or should I say HUSH MONEY) to keep the dirt under the rug.

What would have happened to Jim Swaggart or Jim Baker and their ministries if the TRUTH were never uncovered about them? Is C Stanley's problem less significant or is it just as insidious? I won't go into the FACTS of how Baker and Swaggart DID TRY to cover-up their mess AFTER they got the first whiff the pot was beginning to boil over - that's human nature. I've questioned myself as to how long I would have tried to hold onto that which God was prying out of my grubby hands.

The Holy Bible has warned a number of times (mainly new testament ref) that our church leaders meet the highest moral standards I have ever seen, even as far reaching into their own families!

Now, to the credit of all three men mentioned above, many, many souls were reached by them in so that the Holy Spirit convicted the lost to repent and be eternally saved. Imagine that! Almighty God used these men (and who knows how many others in such lifestyles) to be rescued from eternal damnation. Well praise God! And to Him alone be the Glory forever.

I wouldn't call any of them hypocrites, because I was worse than all of them put together! You might be in my camp too, one things for sure: yellow dirt down in our soul.

The big difference of circumstances is that these matters 'undercover' ARE our business and C Stanley is hiding something. If this continues, the Bible has stated some frightening consequences for ALL parties involved, including his enablers.

Try asking the SBC what they're afaid of most; forgiveness from the Church and Almighty God, or the drop in funds when this scandal breaks. And it will break loose probably sooner than later.

Since the violations were committed while (they) retained God-given positions, and the SBC refuses to release the facts, this will be tried in the highest of all courts. And you all know what happens there...

Anonymous said...

If all it takes is your spouse divorcing you to end a ministry, than why get married? What if the spouse becomes careless in their spiritual walk and the enemy utilizes that to destroy your ministry? People are responsible for their own sin. They have to answer for their own disobedience. I am tired of hearing the old assumption that two are always to blame for a divorce. Where does it say that in the scriptures? The scriptures does say that if your spouse wants to leave and not remain married to you, let that person leave, but if they want to remain with you, than stay married. God has called us to peace. Stanley said in an interview that he still does not know why his wife divorced him. According to him, she never gave him a reason. What is the man to do, throw everything away because his wife left? Why should he allow her to have that much control over his future?

Suzanne said...

The scripture about pastor requirement is 1 Timothy 3:2
"A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife.." It might come as a shock to everyone, but the word "divorce" is not mentioned. Dr. Stanley IS the husband of one wife. She divorced him. He has not remarried. So he is still within that rule. It can be proven that, according to the scriptures he is still married. The Bible says that if someone marries a divorced person, they commit adultery. That means that in God's eyes, someone whose spouse divorced him, except for a biblical reason, in God's eyes, is still married. Therefore, Charles Stanley is still the husband of one wife. As Christians, we should go by biblical reasoning, and not modern society's idea of when to grant a divorce. If Dr. Stanley's wife did not list a biblical reasoning for a divorce, and we understand that she did not, then even more so, in God's eyes, Dr. Stanley is still married to her, so long as he has not remarried, and he has not remarried.

Sunflower

DCT said...

Suzanne: All this is a moot point since Dr Stanley himself said that he would resign if it EVER came to a divorce, specifically because of his beliefs about this from scripture. Funny how quickly his beliefs changed when he went through it; He flip-flopped to newer understanding which conveniently allowed him to stay as senior pastor...His convictions seem to be made of butter, yes? Which others will he change when his back is up against the wall?

How can you trust anyone who lives his "convictions" out this way? Sounds like a politician doesn't it?

Anonymous said...

God will hear your prayer Mr. Charles Stanley.

I know he will.

You have done nothing wrong. what ever is going on is before you and God. Please do not judge Mr. Stanley

Trully yours.
Augusto Freitas

Anonymous said...

Way too many hypocrites posting here. But I'm guess that most, if not all of them, are non-believers. Like are you serious Andrew? How many times in your life have you promised something and then afterwards have to stick your foot in your mouth because it was not of God's will but rather of your own. I'm thankful that Charles realized that he has to obey God and not what the congregation and those judgmental Christians surrounding him. We so often at times say something of ourselves without seeking God's word first. Then we find ourselves back peddling because it's the opposite of what God wants for us to do. So what he said he would step down! Praise God he didn't listen to the hypocrites in the church. If him stepping down was of the will of God, he could no longer be a Preacher in the capacity that he is. Obviously, far from it, he is so blessed. I thank God for Charles, I see him putting it all on the line for God each and every day. You should be ashamed of yourself making the comments that you made. But as Angelo pointed out, we are flesh and sometimes the lust of the flesh rules our hearts. By the way, no where in God's word does it state that we must bear the consequences of our sins! You must be reading a different bible than the rest of us. Jesus bore all the consequences, that's why we live even though we sinned. You shouldn't post from your mind. You shouldn't post such terrible comments.

Dan

Anonymous said...

Andrew was simply pointing out that refusing to allow divorced ppl on the staff and then remaining on the staff himself, certainly made Charles Stanley appear to be a hypocrite. I can't help but wonder if so many ppl are taking up for Charles because he is the one in the limelight. Hardly anyone has stopped to think was could have been going on behind closed doors and what life may have been like for Anna. If Anna were the one in the spotlight, I'm sure most ppl would be defending Anna. This isn't a popularity contest. Only God knows and He loves them both.

Anonymous said...

It was common in biblical times To have more than one wife. It is not practical to think that a man with multiple wives can have the time to pastor a church. I don't believe that the qualifications of a bishop husband of one wife) has anything to do with divorce. But, of those that have multiple wives at the same time. Also, I do think that this is limited to pastoring. I don't believe that this limitation is placed upon the pastor to create a situation of 1st class or 2nd class Christians, but, that a man with multiple wives and families to care for will not be able to adequately take care of the wives and families and a church. In other words, he has multiple prior obligations. For some reason we interpret this to mean a divorced man can't pastor. At least not if he remarries. This would mean that a pastor that has a true call to pastor. Would either have to overlook whatever his wife does(even adultery) because he couldn't divorce. Because if he did, he'd have to remain alone the rest of his life. God has already established that it wasn't good for man to be alone.

DCT said...

The point is that doctor Stanley's publicly stated conviction was that divorced men couldn't pastor...
He never recanted or corrected that statement and yet he continued as senior pastor.

Tina said...

I love Dr. Charles Stanley. I listen to him every Sunday morning while I am putting on my makeup to get ready to go to my church. I also listen to him every morning while I'm putting on my makeup to go to school. It seems he did not want the divorce and tried everything he could to reconcile with his wife. I am glad he did not step down from the pulpit. He is a very gifted minister and has reached thousands. I think he is genuine and loves God with all his heart. He is reaching people all over the world with his sermons. Isn't that what we're here for? Thanks you Dr. Stanley for your wonderful messages. Also, thank you for not hiding your gray like a lot of other evangelists do on TV. I just can't listen to those men who have dyed their hair!!!!!

Anonymous said...

He cheated on his wife. She left and he buried the truth.

Anonymous said...

Ephesians 5: 25 Husbands, AGAPE love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself..."
A Christian wife will not leave her husband who is agape-loving her, cherishing her and honoring her, putting her first after the Lord... she just won't

Am not sure why Anna is being judged, for what she did took the courage of a woman in the perfect helpmeet role, saying "no more abuse" of me - "I will not stay in a marriage where I am unloved by my husband"
Colossians 3: 19 Husbands, AGAPE love your wives and do not be harsh with them.

AGAPE love is a verb //

Wives are encouraged (by OLDER WOMEN) to "philandros" love their husbands

Malachi 2: 16 “The man who hates and divorces his wife, ” says the Lord, the God of Israel, “does violence to the one he should protect,”says the Lord Almighty. So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful." (NONE of us know when it was that Anna was divorced in by her husband IN HIS HEART -- she just made it legal in order to protect herself, which IS biblical (even the Apostle Paul used his right as a Roman citizen)

Deuteronomy 24: 5 If a man has recently married, he must not be sent to war or have any other duty laid on him. For one year he is to be free to stay at home and bring happiness to the wife he has married."

Perhaps, if pastors would teach THESE principles, the divorce rate would go down throughout the "church" and THEN we would actually have marriage that reflect Christ and His bride!

Anonymous said...

As another person commented, I also came here in an attempt to learn the details of their divorce. But there are no "answers" here and until both Dr. Stanley AND Anna Stanley feel inclined to divulge this information, we will never fully understand "why" their marriage ended. I think the majority of comments here have demonstrated a Christ-like mentality of grace & forgiveness and that strengthens my confidence in the Bride of Christ that He will return for.

On the other hand, unfortunately, there are too many comments that resemble the mentality of the Sadducees and Pharisees whose hardened hearts rejected the very essence of God, Emmanuel, our Lord & Savior, Jesus Christ. Imagine being alive and witnessing the ministry of Jesus while on the earth. What an awesome privilege to watch Him heal the broken in spirit & body. Imagine being in His presence and hearing His voice as he taught in the synagogues with such authority. And now imagine being so bound by "religion" and all its rules and regulations that your heart is hardened and unable to embrace who He is, what He's about and why He came to earth. God SO loved us. . .it is a Love like no other. That Love dwells in our hearts and causes us to reach out to the lost, the hurting, the lonely, the homeless, the hopeless, the broken. . .

Anonymous said...

. . .In my life of 49 years, I have experienced tragedies that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. I've received more than one of "those phone calls" that no parent wants to get. I've suffered heartache and pain that left me hanging on by a thread. I've learned first-hand, up-close & personal, what the author of Footprints in the Sand was trying to convey. I was saved at the age of 15 and I wish I could tell you that I have always submitted my will to that of my Father but that's just not the case. I have at times been my own worst enemy and yet, through it all, My God has never forsaken me. He has always provided and has blessed me with the reassurance of his Unending Love, Grace & Mercy time & time again.

My father was homebound for the last several years of his life. He never missed Dr. Stanley's televised sermons and shared Dr. Stanley's words of wisdom with me periodically. In 2008, my father passed and my youngest son's life was being weighed in the balance. Dr. Stanley's ministry was a God-send at that time and continues to be today. When I read the comments of those who insist that Dr. Stanley should have stepped down when his wife divorced him because of the "church’s" rules, I thank God that Dr. Stanley did not listen to them. When I read the comments of those who are "inflamed" that he did not keep his word and step down because he said he would if his wife divorced him, I am more than saddened and would ask you to lay down your unforgiveness & bitterness toward Dr. Stanley and find joy in the fact that his obedience to God has not only resulted in my renewed commitment to God's will in my life and my family's lives, but his obedience has resulted in many others drawing closer to God AND most importantly, has resulted in the salvation of many on a global level. Why swallow a camel, but strain on a gnat? God knows what He is doing - He does not consult the Southern Baptists' rules & regulations and thankfully, He evidently does not operate within your own particular scope and/or lack of understanding when leading and guiding Dr. Stanley's ministry. And I say this with hope in my heart that you will examine your motives and allow God to heal you of a bitter, religious spirit that would fight against the miracles He has done and continues to do in the lives of His children.

We will ALL answer for our choices one day. I will, you will, and Dr. Stanley will. In the meantime, let's let God be God and get onboard with what HE wants us to do: go ye into all of the world, teaching that Precious Name, sweet Love and Grace proclaim, not here & there, but EVERYWHERE.

Jeaa said...

A couple of years ago then i was still in Utah, my husband and i got into a fight and he moved out and said he cant live with me and his son anymore because i cut him cheating seeing the messages and emails on his phone, and even pictures they snapped in the beach with a yong girl, he denials it and left for another state so that he can have al the time in world to be free with this girl. My heart could not contain the pains that i had to travel to my home town, The a friend told me about a spell lady who helped her when she got dumped by her boyfriend. this sound crazy to me that my husband i trust with my life could do this to me. it was so unbelievable. I cried all night long, locked myself in a padded room, and thought about how miserable my life was, so i look at the web site my friend gave me about the spell lady at priestessifaagreatspellpowers.web.com, and i saw how powerful and helpful she would be. i contacted her and she decide to help me and guarantee me of results in 2days, i thgouht this was a joke, how can i see result so quickly, but i gave in to see, and at the actual time, my husband came apologising for all his stupid act, this looks sacry because this was so fast and accurate, But the most happiest part is that my family is once united again just as it was when we got married.
The spell lady has no measure and i can never stop spreading her good works for bringing me happiness and joy. She helped my friend and now am testifying to it, why not do the same and dont make mistake in meeting rip you off on your pain. her email is priestessifaa@yahoo.com,
Thanks spell goddess. you are wonderfully sweet to meet.

Louise C said...

We do not know the truth of the Stanley's marriage or divorce. Mrs. Stanley said she was not one of her husbands priorities. We do not know what she meant, or the truth of her statement. Was Mr. Stanley a workaholic pastor, neglecting his wife and children for his ministry? Were Mrs. Stanley's needs and expectations unreasonable? Were they enmeshed in ways of being husband and wife that left both feeling unconnected, lonely and unappreciated?

The truth is we do not know the truth of the Stanley's marriage or divorce. It would have showed humility and accountability for Mr. Stanley to step down from the ministry for a time of reflection, repentance and healing. It certainly would have been a humble act to have offered grace to the divorced persons who were excluded in some way from participation in First Baptist Church's ministry. It looked like an abuse of power and a double standard to have pushed forward, especially after he had threatened to resign if the separation turned to divorce. No, we don't know the truth of the Stanley's divorce. Unfortunately we have seen the result when integrity and humility are divorced from power and position.

Louise C said...

It is speculation. However, Mr. Stanley held himself to another standard than other Christians, both lay and ordained, when he did not remove himself from the pulpit for even a short time of reflection, repentance, and restoration. That he is a 'great man' (whatever that means) and a great preacher matters not -is he a great man of obedient faith?

Mr Stanley would not be the first Christian to hear what he wanted to hear when he prayed over stepping down.

Louise C said...

You do not know if Mrs. Stanley was struggling with submission. We do not know the truth of what happened in the Stanley's marriage. It would have been a humble and faithful thing for Mr. Stanley to step down for a time of prayer, repentance, healing and restoration, especially since he had promised the congregation to do so.

Anonymous said...

I believe Dr. Standley is a God fearing man, the church was was wrong in judging him. His wife divorced him. The Bible says if your spouse wants to divorce you you can get them a written divorce. He has blessed so many lives. God bless you Dr. stanley.

dr bright said...

I NEVER BELIEVE ONE DAY I WILL GIVE TESTIMONIES ABOUT MY RELATIONSHIP. IT ALL HAPPEN THIS WAY FIVE YEARS AGO, MY HUSBAND STARTED
CHEATING ON ME HE STOP CALLING ME, AND FIND PLEASURES IN GOING OUT WITH OTHER GIRLS, ANY TIME I CALL HIM THE TWO OPTIONS IS TO BOUNCE MY CALLS OR INSULT ME AND MY FAMILY. I WAS SO WORRIED BECAUSE I LOVE HIM SO MUCH AND WE ALREADY HAVE TWO KINDS. THINGS WAS GETTING FROM BAD TO WORST, I WAS GETTING SICK EVERY DAY, EATEN WAS ALSO A PROBLEM TO ME, BECAUSE I LOST MY APPETITE COMPLETELY, ONE DAY I MEET A FRIEND AND DISCUSS IT WITH HER, SHE TOLD ME TO CONTACT (DR ODALO(, THAT HIS PROBLEM WAS WORST THEN MY BEFORE, THAT ONLY (DR ODALO) CAN HELP ME IN THIS SITUATION, AND I WAS A WOMAN WHO DOSE NOT BELIEVE IN SPELL, SO THE LAST TIME I CALLED MY MAN HE PICKED MY CALL, ALL I COULD HEAR FROM HIM IS TO TELL ME THAT HE HAS GOTTEN ANOTHER GIRL TO MARRY, AND THEY ARE IN SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP. I WAS SO CONFUSE AND I CALLED MY FRIEND (MARY) AND TOLD HER WHAT I JUST HAD FROM MY MAN. SHE STILL REMIND ME OF (DR ODALO) THAT HE IS THE ONLY PERSON WHO CAN HELP ME SOLVED MY PROBLEM BY BRINGING MY MAN BACK TO ME. SO THERE WAS NO OPTION FOR ME I TOLD HER TO SEND ME THE EMAIL OF DR DOVE. THAT WAS HOW I CONTACT (DR ODALO) FOR HELP. DR ODALO ONLY TOLD ME THAT IT WILL ONLY TAKE HIM 48HOURS TO BRING MY HUSBAND BACK, I WAS SO SURPRISE IN 48HOURS TIME MY HUSBAND CAME BACK TO ME AND START BEGGING FOR FORGIVENESS, AND I ACCEPTED ALL HIS APOLOGIES BECAUSE I LOVE HIM SO MUCH, WE ARE NOW HAPPY FAMILY AND OUR KIDS ARE HAPPY WITH US. THANK YOU DR ODALO FOR YOUR GOOD WORK, I WILL CONTINUE TESTIFYING FOR YOUR GOOD WORK, CONTACT HIM IF YOU NEED HIS HELP IN ANYTHING BOTH RELATION AND OUTSIDE RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS EMAIL ADDRESS. drodalolovespell@outlook.com once again thanks. drodalolovespell@outlook.com

1. He can help you cast a spell to get pregnant.
2. He can help you cast a Death Spell.
3. He can help you cast a Promotion spell.
4. He can help you cast Lottery spell.
5. Spell of luck.
6. Spell of Finance, and lot more.

Anonymous said...

I like Dr. Charles Stanley. I am not going to judge him for his divorce. All I can say is that as long as he is human like us he can never be perfect. We are all not perfect but it is encouraging when we continue to do God's work and not use our imperfections as an excuse.

SimpleeRed said...

I would date him. I am going through a similar situation with my husband after 34 years, of marriage. I love him, but he will always see himself as not getting what he wants and a " victim." I wonder if his ex was an only child as well?
God keeps us refined...so this obviously is set the red back on fire in my ginger hair! Ya all ( especially you poor theologically trained Sadducees who do not have the man balls to post comments with a name) should be praying and praising your brother...that ol' man can be any of YOU.

Anonymous said...

He has proved by his conduct that he is a sinner like all of us. Too bad he is in a position of power and it has captured his soul. My heart goes out to him. He is certainly no Dr. Roy Mclain.

Eva Shaw

Anonymous said...

Dr Stanley played a big part om my convertion and spiritual growth as a Christian. I started watching or listening to his preachings for more than ten years now from the Philippines and up to now that i moved here in Sweden.

I just come to know today that we was divorced after listening to his sermons for years... His divorce, for whatever reason, did not change my respect for him as a chosen man of God. Human as he was, still God continues to use him to build His kingdom here on earth.

Who in this world can question God's wisdom? We know that in the Bible how GOD used people even in their weakness to accomplish His purpose. Their obedience to the will of GOD made them set apart from all the rest.

Sherry Francis said...

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Anonymous said...

The fact that a divorce would quickly disenchant alot of people and it shows hypocrisy. A life of walking in Spirit would not lead to such a thing. Especially if a man and woman are REALLY walking in it.

There should be no reason for divorce. Because there is nothing in a Spirit led life that should lead to it. All problems can be overcome through TRUTH. But like with all pastors, there is HUGE hypocrisy. They tell truths. But they leave out a lot to suit a worldly life. Charles Stanley for instance. He gives a good explanation about what it means to Walk in the Holy Spirit. But the big problem is that he leaves out the first part, which is to sacrifice your worldly life FIRST. Jesus spoke of the gate to the narrow path. It is the only true path to Salvation. He submitted the initial commitment of this path to our own will. In other words, we must take it upon ourselves to leave the worldly life behind. Beyond this commitment lies the path. The Spirit then guides our life. But not beforehand.

This is why we have divorces. Because people want to believe PART of the TRUTH, but not all. Pastors have successfully used the Scriptures to bring personal wealth. Stanley has given up nothing that I can see. Hr prospers better than most of the people who live around me. He can talk the talk. But clearly, he cannot walk the walk. He left out the part where you can live IN this world, but not OF it to serve GOD. Look around you. Does it look like anyone is giving up the world? Not at all. They are still indulging, more and more. Not less and less. They are NOT guided by the Spirit. But they still flock to the churches to listen to the sermons. Stanley is equivalent to the devil becoming a pastor in order to warn you of the devil. He will tell you truth. But not ALL TRUTH. You will still walk out of that church, not feeling compelled to derail your present life to lead one simplistic and more in touch with the SPIRIT. Jesus didn't live poorly for nothing. This world tempts us at every turn. hence the reason why we must literally step away from it. Even Stanley tells of how the disciples were told to "sit still" until they were ready to live by example. Even the devil knows the TRUTH. But pastors do not live by example. They stand on a pedestal. And you can trust that "something" is wrong with what they are telling you. Even if it means they are telling you 100% of the truth taken from 50% of ALL TRUTH.

http://worldhatestruth.blogspot.com/

KBeast said...

I am writing this of course many years after the original discourse on this issue. I think that the main issue that has been overlooked by most in this discussion was the fact that Anna is the one who chose to end the marriage. There is only one possible Biblical reason for divorce and that is adultery, as given by Jesus in the Gospels. Since there is no evidence of adultery on Charles part, nor did she accuse him of such, Anna had no Biblical reason for divorcing Charles. She made an ungodly self centered decision to end the marriage. Now, in saying this I am not saying that the problems in her marriage were not all her fault. But, the decision to divorce was, and as such affected negatively her family and countless other people. Now, as to Dr. Stanley being a pastor, the Bible does not say a divorced man can't be one, rather only that he must be the husband of one wife. So, no matter how you look at that queston, since Charles never remarried he is not disobeying scripture by pastoring.

Pam said...

Thank you for sharing this. I had heard once that Anna was "tired of being under a microscope" which I assume meant being in the public eye.

Anonymous said...

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Anonymous said...

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Gloria Tandal said...

I just got through watching the last half of Giglio, Andrew & Dr. Stanley on TBN tonight. I had heard rumors of Dr Stanley's divorce years ago so I had to google it to make sure hoping it was not true. With all the comments and scriptures used in this blog, e.g., who was to blame for the divorce, etc., that is not the point. God loves the both of them & is a very forgiving Father but His reputation is at stake here, not theirs. In this situation we are to uphold His name for the sake of His church and unbelievers. It's not about Dr. & Mrs. Stanley. This divorce did not bring glory to God, for sure, and even though Dr. Stanley was not at fault he should be concerned about what people think about His (God's) church, not his (Dr. Stanley's) preaching. He will eventually have in his congregation many followers like him who are divorced through no fault of theirs also and pastoring. I strongly believe Dr. Stanley knows all this and that he is not fully at peace within himself.