For Dennis, his abandonment trauma was an awakening. It helped him a lot to change the direction of his life. He knew he had much work to do. But at last, he knew what was truly important. It took losing his wife to another man and therapy to finally shatter his illusion of permanence and self-sufficiency.
Somewhere in the abyss he was sharing in our sessions, missing his wife, he was able to look up. He felt so astounded at how painful the abandonment and loss was. He realized how alone he was. He was in a critical period during which he must look to his own resources.
But something even deeper happened to Dennis. He discovered the secret gift of his abandonment and loss. It helped him find his way to "old wounds" from traumatic events he may not even remember. Finally, he can address his long unprocessed, unresolved feelings.
Abandonment and trauma may do accomplish more quickly what many psychotherapists strive for in years of therapy -- bringing you to the seat of your "unconscious." To your deepest parts, where lie your permanent recovery and wholeness.
Beyond the support of family, friends, and therapists, you spend most of your waking time with your own self. As your own separate self, you face this challenge alone. First you must be in touch with your secret fears and pains. Listen to what they're telling you about your emotional needs.
The journey to the core of the self, preparing you for deep-level healing, is the secret gift of abandonment and trauma. It's a crucial opportunity to shape your life from the inside out.
Receive the gift. You'll forever be changed by it.