Sunday, September 19, 2010

Attachment or Needing To Be In Control Is a Basis of Suffering

I think of some past personal experiences that taught me His wisdom: life can not be controlled. Life's process is mysterious, it goes on no matter what we do. I thank God for this deep lesson. The need to be in control is closely linked to "attachment." Attachment or needing to be in control is always a basis for pain and suffering. That's because its founded on the false notion that we can control anything or anybody. There are other major life issues connected to attachment or needing to be in control, such as: dependency, trust, self-esteem, shame, power, spontaneity, experiencing emotions etc. Many wounded among us have not worked through these important life issues. We therefore discover that a most powerful healing act is giving up our need to always be in control. In the context of faith, this freedom entails "surrender" (not the same as "giving up" or "not doing one's best"). It essentially involves trust in the sovereignty of God. This is the spiritual aspect of therapy/recovery, which ameliorates needless pain and suffering in our lives.

"Then Jesus said to His disciples ... 'For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it' " (Matthew 16:25).

"That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong" (2 Corinthians 12:10).

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