Sunday, March 17, 2013

What are you doing with your children when you sleep with someone who is not your spouse?

In my work as a psychotherapist, I met married men and women who practice casual sex and/or having affairs. They spoke openly of their sexual exploits and encounters. One married man with several children I met was even advocating "open marriage" and resenting the lack of "maturity" of his wife with which she handles his affairs.

I discovered, I am sad to say, an amazing lack of concern too on the part of the married women on the consequences of their affairs.  Not only do some of them leave their children for full-time jobs or to be OFWs, they also engage in extramarital affairs and sleep with men who are not their husbands.

Few of these married men and women have contemplated the cost and harm they're inflicting on their children, in terms of personal pain and "hidden" inter-generational consequences, for their affairs or illicit sexual liaisons. Statistics show an epidemic of children of these parents growing up with severe psychological, emotional, and behavioral problems. I met some who even became addicted, criminal, and suicidal due to their parents' separation and indiscretion. How humanly appalling - the pain and disorder in these children's lives.

Mostly, it's the "cultural sexual sell." That the mere presence of sexual hunger indicates that it must be satisfied. That one's happiness and sexual needs have top priority. All else, including the children of these unfaithful married men and women (even God as well), is secondary. This lie has battered lives and further scarred children for generations now.

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