Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Character and Broken Vows

Nowadays, broken marriage vows have become epidemic with over half of marriages experiencing adultery or divorce. This accounts for increasing numbers of dyfunctional families and traumatized children in our midst in need of help. Broken vows never lead anything good for society.

 In a counseling session, a cheating wife rationalized around her affair by saying that she has a "right to be happy." She chose to cover up her sin by making excuses and blaming her husband instead of taking responsibility. Her selfishness and self-obsession resulted in a broken marriage with all the emotional, financial, spiritual, and family fallout that followed.

Breaking your marriage vow reveals the truth about your character. It exposes what stuff you're made of. It shows that you're not a person of integrity. Your word cannot be trusted.  While you don't see or realize it, your unhappiness is not coming from your spouse. It's coming from inside your self. It's a character issue. Without a strong commitment to personal integrity and character, you cannot be happy with your self or with anyone else.

The absence of character exposed by a broken marital vow explains why it's likely to be broken again. According to the Institute for American Values, second marriages end in a rate of 60-67% and third marriages at a whopping 70-73%. What can you expect from a person who does not honor a vow?  Marry a person who cheats on his or her spouse and you can expect or suspect to be cheated on.

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