Saturday, March 10, 2018

Unconscious Rage

My client Rebecca has been walking on eggshells for many years. She has a very critical, emotionally abusive husband.

All the time, she kept quiet and unreactive.

While shopping in a mall one day, she discovered something uncharacteristic about her.

Just with a slight oversight from a sales lady, she suddenly burst into a whirlwind of anger and tears.

What happened to Rebecca? Where was her sudden rage coming from?

Too often, we behave uncharacteristically when we experience overwhelming unmet needs. Usually, psychological and emotional.

Intimate betrayal or abuse can make it very hard to be your self. Even the slightest provocation or memory can unleash your intense emotions that may be generalized to others you interact with.

The automatic emotional reactivity is unconsciously motivated. In the case of Rebecca, it's evidenced by her public embarrassment and remorse.

She knew it's not the "real" her!

Previous to me, Rebecca saw two psychiatrists who merely prescribed brain drugs to her. Her taking the drugs did not make her problems go away.

My approach to emotional healing is quite different. Brain drugs don't cure to the core. They may actually be harmful to your health in the long run.

So, I don't believe in it.

I assured Rebecca that her emotional reactions were normal. Quite common, understandable. They were a natural result of a sense of self scraped raw by emotional abuse and wounding.

The "roots" of her recovery then lie in resolving these underlying emotional wounds. They're non-physical or non-chemical.  It's psychological, emotional, and spiritual.

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