Tuesday, August 07, 2018
Top Secret to Get Well
Of the things that matter to really get well, one top secret stands out: taking responsibility for your life.
But I observe that we all seemed more conditioned to blame.
In my sessions, I have yet to hear individuals, couples, or families not blaming any one or anything. For their problems, struggles, or failures.
They often blame their parents, their spouses, their children, friends, co-workers, business partners, the weather, the economy, the government, the lack of money etc.
People often don't want to see where lies the roots of their problem - within themselves.
Psychotherapist/writer John Monborquet once told of a story of a man looking for his car keys in front of a neighbor's house.
His neighbor asked him, "Are you sure you lost it there?" The man responded, "No, I lost it in my house."
"Then, why are you looking for your lost keys here?" the neighbor queried.
The man said, "Because there is more street light here on front of your house!"
Whether in psychotherapy or any aspect of our lives, we all need to take 100% personal responsibility.
This means, you are the main author of your choices, decisions, experiences - whether the result is success or failure, happiness or sadness.
The moment you take 100% responsibility for your life is the moment you heal and become whole.
Such involves letting go of excuses. Giving up the habit of blaming people or circumstances.
As George W. Carver put it, "99% of all failures come from people who have a habit of making excuses."
If you want to truly heal, move on, and have a better future, take away the excuses.
Take responsibility for your every move. Your top secret to get well.