Thursday, August 09, 2018

When People's Opinions Matter Too Much to You

Do you hyper-focus on other people's opinions about you?

A few days ago, I received a Skype text message from Gina. She's one of my emergency online therapy patients.

She said, "Doc, I feel I'm breaking down. I can't help not thinking about what my friend said about me the last time we talked. I can't eat and sleep and go to work."

Gina is used to overthinking and overreacting to what other people say about her.  She put too much attention, time, and energy into it.

As a result, she found her self constantly getting depressed, sleepless, crying, and unable to function.

Gina is not alone. Like Gina, a lot of us struggle with OPO ("other people's opinion") about us.


Solution? Practice my two-point "what really matters" healing focus.

There are only two opinions that should matter the most in your life: 1. God's opinion about you; and 2. Your own opinion about your self.

That's your two most important conversations - your conversation with God and your conversation with your self.

Focusing on God's opinion about you yields ultimate truth.

In Mark 12:14, Jesus was known as follows:

"Teacher, we know that You Are true, and care about no one; for you do not regard the person of men, but teach the way of God in truth."

 Focusing on your own opinion about you yields self love.

Noted author, Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, writes:

"People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is light within."

The next time you get hurt by other people's opinion about you, remember where to focus. 

God-opinion. Self-opinion.

Such focus puts a wisdom smile on your face.