Thursday, March 14, 2019

Are You Intimacy-Phobic?

Mary experienced a string of five broken romantic and sexual relationships in the past.

Since her teenage years onwards, almost all of the men she'd been in a relationship with cheated on her.

Now at 30, she has become fearful and anxious.

Her panic attacks at times manifest during social occasions involving men. Because of this, she backs off from people around her.

She has become afraid of befriending or dating new men, for fear of being lied to, used, betrayed, or manipulated again.


This is sad. Mary is afraid. So she hides. She hides her true self. Her fears do terrible things to her self and relationships.

How do you get the confidence and courage again to be close to others? To take the first step and connect with someone in intimacy?

In therapy and counseling, the fear of intimacy is a psychological wound that needs healing.

It takes one to a deep process of recovery and freedom from the fear of intimacy and relationship with others.

In one of her blog posts, counselor Samantha de Bono says,  "Overcoming a fear of intimacy isn’t easy, it means being brave enough to really look at one’s self  honestly, being able to explore painful pasts, probably as far back as childhood. It takes time and understanding of what put the fear in place to start with, but it can be done and has been done for many ..."

Paul's letter to Timothy contains a prescription to the intimacy-phobic, in general:

"For God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind" (2 Tim. 1:7).

Get your copy of “Secrets of Your Self:”
https://www.kobo.com/ph/en/ebook/secrets-of-your-self