Monday, August 26, 2019

When Problems Are More In Your Mind Than in Reality

In the face of any trial or challenge in life, we all need a place of calm. Without it, we get lost or bring undue suffering into ourselves.

Yet people do overthink. They tend to over-worry. Especially so, when they feel overwhelmed by big problems, abuses, or losses they experience in their lives.

Going over and over her husband’s infidelity didn’t help Melissa both within herself and repair of the marriage with her remorseful spouse.

Continually dwelling on, brooding and complaining about it only made her feel worse. It also produced painful anger outbursts and unnecessary humiliations and separations from her husband who was very willing to reform.

Instead of facilitating a healing environment for their mutual recommitment to their marriage, Melissa had been bringing things to a greater painful point - suffering over her suffering.

Translate: some problems may be more in our mind than in reality.

When you find your self overcome by too much negativity, get inside your mind and ask:

Why am I making things even more problematic and painful?

Am I trying to control what is outside my control?

Is there a hidden part of me that I need to see which gives an excuse to avoid changing my self or moving towards a solution?

I’m reminded of an old but essential slogan, “Think positive.”

We all have struggles or wounds at times. But it doesn’t always help to focus on what is wrong. We can learn to accept our self and life as it is, and remember to practice faith and positivity.

Of course, I don’t mean that we avoid thinking of our problems or pretending that everything is fine. Just simply refrain from making things more painful than they need to be.

As writer Jessica Davidson aptly put it, “From that still center in your heart, you can approach every problem with compassion by emphasizing the positive without denying the negative.”

Secrets of Your Self: