Learning to Love Your Self

Virginia Satir, an esteemed psychotherapist and author, wrote of the essential of “self love.”

I say most people have a problem with this. 

As I’ve witnessed in my therapy sessions, the answer to and practice of personal “self love” is not easy.

A woman in an online session spoke of her husband calling her “bitch.”  This makes her feel bad about her self.

When I inquired about her, she said that her husband misunderstands her assertiveness as bitchiness. 

She’s making a valid point: bitchiness is different from assertiveness.

Assertiveness is a positive way of loving your self. It’s sticking up for and respecting your self.

Once she internalizes that difference enough, she can learn to accept that as part of her self and to feel good about it ... no matter what her husband or other people say about it.

Psychologist Carl Rogers observed that when you learn to accept your self as you are, that gives you permission to grow and change.

Learning to love your self makes you become the person you want to be.

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