Healing is Never “One Go”

“When you think that it takes 9 months to grow a baby, it’s not surprising that it takes 70 years and more to grow a soul.”
   — Elizabeth Yates, quoting s 75-year-old woman in her book “Call It Zest: The Vital Ingredient After Seventy”

“Doc, he needs to change. Can you be more direct and confront him of his mistakes?,”asked Rita only after our first couple session with her partner.

She’s a woman in a hurry. Having suffered enough verbal and emotional abuse from him, she wanted instant relief.

Of course, Rita’s sentiment is understandable. I wish it can be done, like magic.

But it’s not reality.

Nobody could face deep psychological pain, dysfunction, or wound all at once. 

Real recovery occurs little by little, often over long periods of time. It’s never one go.

Healing, then, is a process - and not a quickie one-time event. 

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In psychotherapy, as in most areas of human development, perseverance is important. It holds the key to success and effective recovery.

It means, among other things, not to turn away whenever you feel threatened.

Of course, at the same time, you don’t drive yourself too hard than your capacity can manage.

Take comfort even with slower yet forward movement.

As psychotherapist/author Dr. put it,

“Each new bit of self awareness, each step forward, has its value.”