Should You Kill Painful Memories?
Memories are human. We do a lot of memory-making.
In psychotherapy, there’s much of that to help heal a person’s emotional woundedness.
People always tell stories. They remember events, images, or flashbacks from the past to try to make sense of.
When they can’t, they spin. They act crazy.
Tina, in a Zoom session, recalled her childhood memories.
She remembered her mother repeatedly berating and hitting her. Especially in relation to house chores and school performance.
Even at 50, she still reacts to those painful memories as if they happened only yesterday.
She’d shout. She’d curse. She’d tremble. She’d cry profusely. Whenever she’s brought back to those memories in her mind.
Those memories with her mother from the past continue to still hurt, overpower, distract, and mislead Tina in her current life.
Should Tina “kill” those painful memories?
Don’t. Tina just needs to “notice” them. Let them float by. Respond to them, not react.
Process the unprocessed. Resolve the unresolved. Heal progressively,
No other choice. The only way out is through.
Slowly ... and it happens a lot, the pain of the memories starts to subside.
Until there’s nothing left to notice at all.