Statistically, about 60% of married people will commit adultery at some point in their marriage (check infidelity statistics: 1 ; 2).
A lot of counselors, friends, priests, and pastors are making a mess of the lives of individuals recovering from infidelity on a "hunch." Many of them fell into the "cause and effect trap" or other simplistic explanations. This is disastrous when it comes to personal and marital recovery.
These people helpers mean well. But when it comes to woundedness caused by infidelity, there is simply no or little experience or training offered in medical schools, psychology graduate schools, universities, and seminaries.
Among professional therapists and doctors, there is also found little positive help. Based on the personal experience of author/psychologist and infidelity recovery specialist, Peggy Vaughan, she testified that she was unable to find professional help that is considered helpful and effective at a time when she and her husband were healing their marriage from a series of extra-marital affairs.
According to a well known research done by Peggy herself, results showed that only 13% of therapists know how to address infidelity. This was based on a survey of 1,083 people whose spouses had affairs.
Here were more highlights of Peggy's research:
* On page 32, "Was the counselor helpful?"(861 responses)
57% - No, mostly frustrating
23% - Yes, but not as much as I'd like
20% - Yes, very helpful
* On pg. 33, the question is asked: "Did the counselor focus directly on the issue of affairs?" (725 Responses)
59% - No, mainly focused on general marital problems
28% - yes, but not as strongly or clearly as I'd like
13% - Yes, very directly dealt with this issue.
From this survey, something is wrong when over half of hurt spouses recovering from infidelity say their psychotherapy/counseling is of very little help or lacking in effectiveness.
Now my point is this: as a psychotherapist myself, I want to advance the proper and adequate treatment of infidelity in a holistic way. To that end, if you're suffering from your spouse's infidelity and betrayal, I'd like to help you. What I share with you is infidelity treatment that's not merely based on clinical perspective or theory, but on "experienced reality," transcendence, and "whole self" therapy.
To begin your affair recovery journey, feel free to call or text me at my 24/7 Hotline +63 9090833374 or email me at email@example.com.
Dr. Subida's Related Posts/Links:
The Infidelity Virus
Surviving Infidelity and Separation
Infidelity Epidemic Among Women
Why The Cheating (GMA News)
Signs of Infidelity (ABS CBN 2 DZMM)
When Your Cheating Spouse Is
Unwilling To Give Up The OP (other person)
Dr. Angelo Subida's CLINICAL INFIDELITY TREATMENT
Infidelity is a deepest cut or wound. Though it devastates a relationship, a marriage can not only recover from adultery, but flourish after it. The recovery process takes time, appropriate nurture and inputs, lots of patience and grace.
This program, "Clinical Infidelity Treatment," will start you (individually and/or maritally) on that journey. It will be your basic survival process. You won't be completely finished yet with this wildfire, but you will have contained it enough by then.
Dr. Subida's personalized and customized program will guide you and/or your spouse toward 5 therapeutic outcomes:
1. Stabilize the individual spouses and the marriage in the initial crisis;
2. Provide structure for an emotionally volatile environment;
3. Bring closure to the "old" marriage - the marriage prior to the affair;
4. Set established skills necessary for the "new" marriage pattern;
5. Answer the questions: How could you do this to me? Why did you do it?
Dr. Subida's Clinical Infidelity Treatment program is built upon regular therapy sessions, therapeutic homework exercises initiated by each spouse. The homework will include touching exercises, monologues, and dialogues.
Among others, the following healing pieces - both for personal recovery and marital recovery - will be covered within Dr. Subida's revolutionary Clinical Infidelity Treatment:
* First Aid for Healing from Infidelity
* Key concepts of recovery
* Personal Recovery/Marital Recovery Core Issues
* Family-of-Origin Practices That Predisposed the Marriage to Infidelity
* Personal Patterns that Predisposed the Marriage to Infidelity
* Circumstances That Triggered the Affair
* Looking at your marital history
* Marital Style
* Preparing for and Processing Forgiveness
* Rebuilding Trust
* Reconnecting with Each Other in the "New Marriage"
* Things I Have Learned and Changes I Have Made
* Into the Future
* The Main Secret for Affair Recovery
AFFAIR RECOVERY TIMELINE:
Here below is Reynold's Affair Recovery Timeline based on professional treatment of thousands of recovering couples, to track down your own healing progress. Ideally, timeline progresses according to stages. But we are humans (not machines) so the process usually turns out to be more circular rather than linear. Don't worry about whether you're within the time frame. Each individual and each couple is unique and has a context, depending also on the severity or depth of wounds being dealt with. The important point is to continue moving on till you reach a point of stability, and then the breakthrough.